Tie My Heartstring's ❦

haunt

Hudson

A few weeks passed, and we fell back into our routine. I had Katie, and life had gifted me this girl, and for that reason alone, I never wanted to forget it.

I'd forgotten all the materialistic stuff. All I wanted was my sweet girl. I no longer walked on thin ice around her. I touched her at every opportunity I got, letting her know how much she meant to me.

I made her coffee in the mornings, did her laundry, bought her new clothes, and even ran her a hot bath when it was just us alone. Every gesture, no matter how small, felt like a way to show my affection and dedication to her.

Yet now and again, paranoia would invade my brain, like an unwelcome shadow creeping into my thoughts. I didn't understand why it plagued me. It pained me to think that I might have truly screwed everything up with my small, careless mistakes.

But no, I had been honest with her. I even told her about Maggie, my past relationship, and she accepted me without hesitation. My mind played tricks on me often. The weight of my subconscious loomed over my heart. She had forgiven me. She had said so herself. But did she really? Of course, she did. I forced myself to believe it. My steps turned from heavy to light as I moved through the house, careful not to disturb her.

Katie was asleep, her peaceful face a grounding in the storm of my thoughts. I missed her more than usual today. I had busied myself with work most of the day. While she liked to sleep in, I always longed for her presence, even when she was just across the room. My love for her was painfully perfect in every way.

Even though I'd known her for many years, my heartbeat fluttered erratically when she was near. Love was an odd thing, often misused and misunderstood. But this was the real thing. You could barely understand it, and it would often slip away if you didn't hold on tightly enough.

Everyone around me told me I was crazy and obsessive. My piece-of-shit father, my drunk of a mother, and my ex had all painted my feelings in the darkest hues. I agreed with them, of course, but deep down, I felt my obsessiveness had evolved.

When I wanted something, there was no turning back. I would go to the ends of the earth to grasp it, to hold it in my hands and never let go. That was one reason I refused to give up on Katie.

Shortly after Katie woke up, she joined me for breakfast in the kitchen, as was our usual routine. But something about her felt different today. She had been asking more questions about my past lately, and I hated to admit it, but it resurfaced memories I preferred to keep buried. I'd always prided myself on being a man of secrets, but the closer we got, the harder it became to keep her at bay. "Morning," she chirped, that sweet smile lighting up the room.

"Morning, baby," I replied, unable to suppress a smile of my own. "You slept forever."

A genuine smile cracked across her face as she poured herself a glass of orange juice. "You didn't believe me when I told you I could sleep for days if I wanted to."

I laughed, and I did believe it. She had a knack for resting deeper than anyone I knew. "How was work?" she asked, turning her gaze to me, a hint of concern lacing her voice. "You look tired."

I sighed, feeling the weight of her gaze. "I saw your dad," I admitted, my tone rougher than I intended.  She swallowed hard at that. "Oh?"  I could tell she wanted to delve deeper, to ask about my job and my daily errands, but she held back. It was a familiar dance we performed, but this time it felt particularly precarious.

"Yeah, it didn't go so well," I chuckled harshly, remembering our last confrontation. Anger surged through me at the recollection of his harsh words. I clenched my fists together, forcing the feeling away. "Well, what happened?" she turned fully to face me, her concern palpable.