Ronnie

25

The ride back home was silent. Kirk stared intently down the road, making sure not to check his right hand mirror in fear that he would glance at the woman sitting next to him.

She kept her head down as she wrapped her arms around her torso; protecting herself from whatever came next.

Kirk rolled into the driveway, he opened his door quickly and closed it as if he had no care in the world. He paced to the hood of the car and glanced at Cassie. He took a step towards the house but decided to scamper over and open Cassies door. 

Cassie looked up at him but he kept his head down

"Thank you," she murmured. 

Kirk did not speak or make any motion to accept what she said. 

He sat on the couch; spine hunched over, knees shoulder width apart, elbows stabbing into the thin layer of skin covering his knee caps, hands cupped around his forehead as he looked at the floor but saw nothing.

Cassie continued past him; not bothering to close her bedroom door. Her body laid flat on the mattress. She didn't know how long she stayed in that exact spot before Kirk stood in her doorway.

"Why did you not tell me?

...

we could have done something about this."

"Like?"

"I could have brought you to the doctor. Maybe they could have fixed it."

Cassie let out an a heavy sigh. "You mean kill it."

"Cas.

You know that's not what I meant."

"Okay."

He stood still for half-a-minute before kicking his used sneakers off and crawling over Cassie without touching her. 

Kirk laid just like her. Back against the mattress, staring into the prickly ceiling. 

She was almost asleep when he interrupted.

"I shouldn't have found out like this Cassie. That isn't right."

"I know."

.

.

.

"You don't have anything else to say?"

"I don't know what else to say. I messed up," she whimpered.

"I want to be angry. I want to scream and fight with you. Maybe even pack my shit and never look back.

But I'm too scared. All I can do is keep my eyes off of you."

"It would be easier to fight. But it won't help anything," she said mostly to herself.

.

.

.

"Cas,

what's next?"

"I call the doctor in the morning. I go to work. And I come home."

"What about me?"

". . . I don't know. Find something to keep you busy. You should be going back on the road at some point?"

"There's too much unknown Cassie. We all have a meeting with the label sometime this week. . . 

But that's not important. You're carrying my baby. . .

I mean. . . it is my baby. Right?"

A single tear rolled down Cassie's cheek as she let out a sickening sigh.

"I-i I'm not sure."

Kirk sat up and stared down at her. She continued staring at the ceiling; her throat began to close up. 

"What do you mean? Who else is there?"

She began to sniffle.

"Fuck," he mumbled to himself.

"We didn't get to tell you or anyone else.

I'm sorry.

We were going to. But."

Kirk jumped off the bed and paced in between the hall and doorway. 

"Cassie." She could hear his tears.

"Please, no. Please don't tell me it was him. Don't tell me it is him."

He bounced to his knees and grasped his face.

"Fuck!"

The sides of his fist slammed against the wooden walls as a groan came out of the depths of his throat. 

"Cliff?" Kirk turned to Cassie looking red in the face with tears welling in his eyes. "It was really Cliff?"

She nodded, at this point her throat was filled with so much fright it wouldn't allow her to speak.

"How long?"

Her eyes shifted to the ground.

"Just tell me Cas, how long?"

"Around June."

"Seriously!? You couldn't even fucking wait before we went home to start fucking my best friend."

"It wasn't just me Kirk," Cassie responded in between sobs. "He wanted me just as bad, don't act like I'm some whore.

And we weren't just fucking! He cared about me, loved me, more than you ever could.

Cliff showed me he could treat me better months before we got together but I always stayed loyal to you.

Can you say the same for yourself Kirk? Hmm? Did you forget about all those girls I had to pull you away from at parties? Do you think I forgot the way you touched them and whispered lies into their ears."

"You fooled me just as much as you fooled those poor girls," steam poured out of Cassies mouth.

Slow tears fell down Kirks face. 

She scoffed, "That's what I thought."

Kirk slipped his shoes back on and stormed into the living room. He through the few belongings he had into a bag and slammed the front door on the way out.

Cassie stood glaring out the window moments after he left. She had no clue where he was going, but as long as the answer was away from her she did not care.