Ronnie

4

Cassie found out later that night that Kirk was drunk (which wasn't a shock). Cliff told her this information, she refused to talk to Kirk. Partly because she was still deeply upset but also because she was putting off the confrontation until it had to be dealt with. No more excuses could be made for him, even if he was drunk; she had to keep telling herself that, or he would slip back in like always.
Kirk stayed in Cliff's room that night. Getting Kirk into the room was a struggle. He fell limp when Cliff tried to get him in the room, he acted like a small child. He begged to be in his own room and laughed like he didn't understand the seriousness of his situation.
Kirk stared right through Cassie, as if she wasn't there while she watched the act unfold in the hallway.
His pupils were wide and hollow. The brown of his eyes seemed darker, almost black. He wasn't himself, that was for sure.
She couldn't stand to watch it anymore. When she walked to her room she could have sworn she heard Kirk yell out for her. Although, it could have been her imagination. Maybe she wanted Kirk to yell out for her, so she would have a reason to go back. So she could have an excuse, "He needed me, I couldn't leave him drunk. We talked things out. Everything's good now," she imagined the conversation with Cliff in her head.
Instead, she continued to her room. Even though she was alone in the room nothing felt missing, nothing felt different. The quiet and calm soaked in and off she went to sleep.

Knock. Knock. Knock.
The door slowly opened.
“We need to talk.”
“Good morning to you too,” he said with slight humor.
His hair was a mess and his eyes were red, he had just woken up.
“Can you think straight? Because I need to have a real conversation.”
“Um, yeah, sure.”
“Yes or no, Kirk?”
“Yes.”
He took a seat on the end of the bed.
“Go ahead Cas.”
She thought she was prepared for this. It was hard to sleep the previous night knowing that this was coming. She kept waking up every few hours, she finally decided to just stay awake. The whole conversation was planned in her head. Now that she was doing it, all of her thoughts and preparedness disappeared.
“Do you remember last night?”
“Barely. I got shit-faced and woke up here. Why?”
Cassie's face turned pale. He didn't remember. She was going to have to relive last night and explain what he did.
“Why Cassie?”
“You don't remember?”
He was suddenly confused and worried. Could he have done something?
“What happened? Did I do something?” he asked with concern.
Words moved through her head carefully.
“You ran off, and I was looking for you. And I found you. But, but, there was this girl. Sitting on your lap. Flirting with you. And. And you just sat there. Letting her.”
“I'm s-”
“No, no Kirk! Don't say you're sorry. You've said that too many times but nothing ever changes.”
“I don't know what you want me to change Cassie.”
“Oh god, we've been over this. I just want you to love me, care about me.”
Now he stood up, face to face with the girl.
“What the hell! I do care about you. You should know that!”
“Then why don't you show it!?”
“I thought I have been.”
“You thought you have been!? Seriously? During the day you barely act like we're together, pretty much all we do is make out, it's nothing more. Then when night comes, you get too fucked up and say mean shit about me. And then the next morning you don't remember anything. It's an endless cycle.”
Kirk was uncertain of what to say. Had he really been acting like this? Honestly, he couldn't remember anything. This whole tour was just one blur.
“I'm sorry Cassie. I care about you, so much. I'll change.”
“You care about me, but do you love me?”
Silence.
Kirk didn't want to lie to her anymore. He didn't love himself, let alone some girl. Hell, he wasn't sure how to love in the way she wanted.
A sad laugh made it's way out of her mouth.
“That's what I thought. I can't do this anymore. I'm done.”
“Please, wait.”
It was too late, she was already out of the door.
Cassie ran to the tour bus, hoping to find Cliff.
When her eyes locked on him the tears broke loose. Not as bad as she imagined they would though. They were slow, gentle tears.
“Come ere' Cas,” Cliff stated with little emotion.
James who was sitting next to Cliff had a strange look on his face.
“I did it Cliff. It's over.”