That's Hollywood | a Spencer Reid Fan-fiction

7. Flowers

Spencer

The ceiling fan spins above me, lit up only by the brightness of the moon shining through the open curtains of the window. I lay above the covers on the bed, clad only in a pair of sleep shorts, my skin still hot to the touch from a day spent out in the sunshine. On the side table next me, my phone dings with an incoming text, dragging me out of a trance that watching the fan spin around had put me in.

Derek
I know it's well past night time over there pretty boy and you still haven't updated me on how it went. You're going to start making me assume you're otherwise occupied *wink wink*

Earlier in the day when I left Ruby in the pool so I could change into my own swim attire, I spent more time than acceptable pacing back and forth across the bedroom with my phone in hands, messaging Derek for advice. The last time I had been in a pool with a beautiful woman had been with Lila, and that situation had escalated pretty fast, completely out of my control. Kissing her had been amazing, but anything we had together was basically over before it started.

Being around Ruby felt different. While the situations could be eerily similar at times, there were many differences between the two girls. With Lila, things never went past a surface level of attraction.

Whereas Ruby, living with her and having her almost constantly within eyesight, it was hard not to become aware of the little things that made her special. Like the soft tired sounds she would make while fixing her morning coffee on early call time days. Or the desire to stop at any remotely cute looking store or cafe, even if it was cutting close to making her late, just so that she could experience and support local businesses.

I hadn't taken much time to consider looking for another relationship after Maeve. It didn't seem worth it after the first few months. Then as time went on, things at work were just too busy. When we would get back from a case I would drown myself in readings, never allowing my brain to think of anything remotely close to personal feelings.

However, the first month of recovery after getting shot was like a nightmare. All of the sudden I had too much time to think about everything I had been avoiding. I wasn't able to concentrate on reading, and I wasn't allowed to call in and help with cases, Hotch stating that I needed all of my mental awareness to be put towards healing.

In a way, I did heal. Physically, but also mentally. When I really started to think about the events that had unfolded and led me to this point, it became easier to accept them. I realized I couldn't change the past, but I could use it as a way to make me stronger.

Asking for advice about a girl from Derek had been a big step. I'm sure he was laughing on the other end of the phone, but his replies were helpful. Even if he thought the situation to be a little funny considering the coincidences between the girls situations, he knew that this was a big moment. The first time I was openly sharing that I was moving on, ready to start over, and he was there to help me through it.

The advice wasn't even that bad, coming from him. He reminded me the most important thing was to not be someone other than myself. But then he said take charge, go out of your comfort zone, show her you think she's attractive without actually saying it. A little easier said than done, in my opinion. But once I came walking outside towards the pool and saw her eyes on me, I realized it wouldn't be that hard.

Spencer
Nothing happened besides flirting.

After we had ate the lunch that Jenna brought back, the moment that Ruby and I shared in the pool had passed. The three of us enjoyed the sun together, chatting and napping on the lounge chairs. Eventually the sun set and we moved inside to watch a couple movies before heading to bed for the night.