I'm sorry for my temper, for my inability to shut up, sometimes—
how I am all chaos and thunder,
have storms raging beneath my skin, in my veins,
I'm sorry for guarding myself so long,
that you wondered if I ever cared for you—I did, I do.
I'm afraid a lot of the time, you see,
Have you seen me happy?
I laugh too loud. Too much,
I ought to apologise for that too,
I'm sorry.You've seen me scared, haven't you?
I probably annoyed you a lot then,
quaking knees and frozen,
I'm scared because you have not seen me downright afraid,
sometimes I cannot sleep at night,
Imagine the darkness swallows me whole and I cannot see you again?
I'm scared of that tooI say sorry a lot, I know,
You've told me that too many times,
I'm sorry—I feel it a lot, it has become second nature,
I breathe the words.But, for once, I hope to say thank you,
thank you for being the parts of me I have lost,
thank you for being so kind and annoying and everything I've never thought I needed,
I had once loved you so much it scared me,
but now I am not afraid of you, what I feel for you,
Why should I?I will hold you, taste your kisses and trace stars on your skin,
And I will do so without feeling the second nature of sorry,
I hope I can create a universe with you and me,
A home for the two of us,
We need a place to call our own, to heal with each other
—maybe I can bake you cookies and you can show me how
cherry tomatoes grow in spring,
I'd like to have a content life with youI adore you much more than you realise,
But I'm not scared of giving everything to you, now,
Cut open my chest and offer you whatever's left of my heart,
Would you still accept the remains of myself even after all of this?I hope you do.
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𝐄𝐩𝐢𝐩𝐡𝐚𝐧𝐲 | ✎
PoetryEpiphany ⇢ ❛𝘈 𝘴𝘶𝘥𝘥𝘦𝘯 𝘮𝘰𝘮𝘦𝘯𝘵 𝘰𝘧 𝘨𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘵 𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘭𝘪𝘴𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯.❜ ❝And even on nights when the dark becomes sticky like tar, when I wish for something to swallow me whole so I don't have to wake up the next day, I still think of you...