Growing up I never really saw true love. I lived alongside spite and like which was what I was taught to be love, I was told the conflict between my parents was normal, the constant arguments, the look of aversion in their eyes, that was love...but through the lies and the cover up of toxicity, I knew better than to settle for the corrupt presentation I was taught.
I began to search for the love I had seen portrayed in the movies, oh how the notebook was the dream I longed for. After constant failure to find the imagery I had created upon my take of love in person, I began to lose ambition. In the end I had completely lost my passion for the real concept of love, the true love I dreamt to view or even experience first hand.
Eventually I came to the conclusion that maybe true love wasn't authentic, instead it was a societal construct to give people something to believe in when struggling to find someone to love or to be loved by with genuineness, I viewed it as a money scam which sounds foolish at first until you investigate deeply into the topic. Love promoted in films gives people the idea to find a significant other, buy a house, have a family, and with all that comes money. A large sum of money gifted to the greedy all because you quote on quote "fell in love".
That became my excuse for blindly turning an eye to the idea of true love, closing myself off completely and falling for the idea of being something to someone rather than loving and being loved through spite of my past failures, which sounds selfish I know, but eventually as a result of my lack of selflessness, my heartless being stumbled. I scraped my knee falling so deeply in love with someone who wandered into my life so unexpectedly and took my hand so effortlessly, leading me out of the discontent I was engulfed by. He wiped away the flowing blood from my raw knee; bandaged my wounds with care and comforted my pain with the affection I unknowingly craved. Everything had changed when I met my Noah, rather than overlooking my longing for my dream house, he gifted me the white house with the blue shutters and a room overlooking the river so we together could paint a presentation our true love to give to that little girl, who was drastically losing hope, something true to believe in.
