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i was talked into going to a party. it may not have been my type of crowd but apparently i deserve it. one of the girls in the house has a birthday today and wanted me to attend her party. this girl knows a lot of people. only reason i agreed was because i felt as though it's been a minute since i've last had fun.
they're in a VIP section because i don't want them all around here. especially being that they're with me for a reason. they could be in danger without even knowing. their families didn't care for them...
i'm not drinking or anything, haven't done that in eight nearly nine years. won't start now. alcohol makes me want things and since my baby isn't here to give it to me, i won't provoke myself. just here to support and be a face for her since she doesn't have family. it's the least i could do.
"here." i was handed a cup but declined once i got a wift of it. by the smell of it i knew it was tequila. perks of being a past alcoholic, i know the smells. "no drink? come on Heir, we're supposed to be having fun."
"i can have fun without that."
"come onnnn. for me?"
i squinted my eyes at her because what makes her think i'll drink for her? we barely even know each other so that just kind of threw me for a loop. making me think there's a reason she would want me to drink so bad. that's just my trust issues starting to roll in.
"i haven't had a drink in almost ten years, no thank you."
"one little drink won't hurt."
"that's what every alcoholic used to tell themselves." i gave a small smile. that's very true. one little drink always turned into several little drinks. and several little drinks always led to something.
not saying i regret my little bean, but she was a mistake. i'm happy i got her out of my mistake though, so it doesn't matter anymore. she's my best girl. i'll give her the world and more if i could.
"i'm sure that wife of yours wouldn't mind."
"ahhh, but she would." i chuckled. this whole time, i hadn't looked at her. her vibe was giving me flirt, but i didn't want to be rude since it's her birthday. she's taking my kindness for weakness right now. especially bringing up my relationship like she knows so much. beyoncé would kill me if she knew i relapsed. even if it is one little drink.
"so you're one that would obey their wife over their own decisions?"
"in certain situations, yes." why wouldn't i? a lot of things take two. i don't always do what i want.
"mmmm. i couldn't see that on you, you seem much more dominant."
i shrugged. she's trying to get somewhere, i feel it. but i won't be the one to fall for that. maybe if i was full of shots and dumb, but no. i've learned my lesson from that. almost killed myself over losing my one reason for living. i don't wanna put my baby in that position of seeing me like that ever again. unless she leaves me.
