The Protectors; Book 3

Mistakes

Illoha's POV:

Foxete has been the only thing on my mind. I didn't say goodbye to her. She died thinking I hated her.
I replay the events that took place moments before her capture.

"I've already forgiven you. I still love you." Foxete grabbed my hand, "Just tell me what I did."
"You didn't do anything. I can't ever have a future with you. We can't get married!" My eyes swelled with tears.
"So what? Marriage is a sheet of paper!" She rolled her eyes, "Love is stronger than that."
"We'll talk about this after. Nothing will go wrong." I kissed her cheek.
"Alright," Fox sighs.
I began to walk away.
"I love you, Illoha." She whispered loud enough so I could hear her.
I hesitated, "And I you."

And I you.

I didn't even say that I loved her.

I'm just like my father.

I hold her jacket in my hands. She gave it to Ru before she left. Almost like she knew. I didn't deserve her, but now there's nothing I can do. Nobody to turn to. Poor Malra. She truly believes that I love her, but I just...

I fall to my knees.

I can't take back what I did.

I clutch the jacket to my chest and cry.

"Get up." I hear Ru's voice behind me.
I stop letting the tears fall and turn my head around. Ru is standing in the doorway.
"You do not deserve to mourn her." He snaps at me.
"She was-" I start.
"Don't. Don't tell me you loved my mother. She loved you, but you betrayed her. You didn't care until she died. You do not deserve to mourn, Illoha." Ru yelled.
"I'm sorry." I choke out.
"Don't humor me. It's pathetic." He laughs.
For a moment I can see Foxete, her anger. How she yelled at Freddy, my father...
He takes the jacket from my arms and leaves me alone.

How could I do this.
Malra walks into the room.
"I saw pipsqueak just leave, what's got him so upset?" She asks.
"We had a bit of a... disagreement." I mumble.
She kneels next to me and tries to kiss me, but I lean away, "Not now. I don't..."
She stands up, "Oh... sorry... I'll uh, see you later." She walks out.
I sigh.

How am I supposed to move on?

"Illoha?" Isel peaks her head in.
God can everyone just leave me alone?
"What do you want?" I snap, turning to face her.
"To help you." She smiles.
I laugh, "How?"
"Just so you don't feel so bad about... you know... you and Malra." She smirks, "Your girlfriend and I were... how do I put this. A bit more than friends."
She... cheated on me too?
We stand in silence.
"Well! Hope that made you feel better!" She hurries out.

I thought she was so perfect...
I guess not.
I guess she was just like me.

Why does it only make it hurt more?

(495 words)