ℕ𝕖𝕩𝕥 𝕋𝕠 𝕐𝕠𝕦 || 9ᴛʜ ᴍᴇᴍʙᴇʀ

𝚃𝚑𝚎 𝙿𝚎𝚛𝚏𝚎𝚌𝚝 𝙿𝚞𝚣𝚣𝚕𝚎

He was relentless. Had he been Seugmin, he would know where she was. Had he been Chan, he would know her favorite places in town. Had he been Hyunjin, he would know every place she would ever be.

But he was only I.N, the only person who knew how to be, and couldn't ever stop being, not even after what had just occurred in the dorms. Because even after she might have hurt him, he wouldn't know what to do with himself if he had let her go all by herself when she was also in pain. He could never stop being himself.

Chan was devastated he chose to go, but I.N could care less, he really could. Because he has taken into account all in what was just said, yelled even. He knew just by seeing the state Chan was in, that Kai would be in the same exact state. Yet the only difference was, she was alone.

Yes, Kai could possibly have withheld information she should not have, and he was frustrated that she did, and that was valid, he knew his feelings were valid. The same way he knew what she was doing could never be of ill intentions. I.N knows the extent of pain she would suffer if it meant protecting the people she loved, especially Chan.

So he couldn't sit there, he couldn't wonder no longer. He knew if he let himself think, he would just hurt himself, so he went out to look for the lone girl.

What he could say that hurt him the most, was not that Kai didn't tell them all what she knew, or that Chan had exploded on her, it was that he wished the rest of the members gave her the benefit of the doubt as he did. Because realistically, they all know her and love her to some extent, in some different ways.

Yet because they know her so well, why didn't they give it a second thought of what Chan said about her lying, because they know damn well Kai would do everything to protect them. From instances of her pretending she didn't have a birthday, to her rethinking the survival show for the betterment of the group, to keep away all the information about her relationship with her parents, that wasn't someone who was hiding things because of selfishness, she was trying to be selfless.

That, I.N could say was her only flaw. She repeats the mistake of thinking that her feelings are invalid to them, or they aren't relevant enough to speak about, but they are. Kai repressed herself from sharing all this information, in order to protect, not to hurt.

They all knew this, but why was it so easy to give up on her? That's what hurt him. Because if it happened to her, if it was so easy to give up on one another, it could happen to any of them.

Then, were they really ever as close as they all thought?

I.N's thoughts were interrupted as the ringtone of his cell phone went off his back pocket. He took out the device from where it was to see the caller ID.

It was Changbin.

He immediately answered. "Hyung?"

"Innie, have you found her yet?" Changbin's voice rang through his ear. He could almost feel the desperation in his voice as he spoke.

"No Hyung, no sign of her. I called her maybe millions of times, sent millions of texts to everyone she knows, but no one has seen her."

I.N heared Changbin's sigh of desperation on the other end of the line. "What is this girl thinking?...Okay um- she's been gone no longer than 2 hours, she has to be somewhere near. Kai isn't dumb she would stay here in Seoul, right?" Changbin asked for reassurance, something he never really had to do.

I.N nodded into the phone. "She wouldn't leave Seoul Hyung, no matter what state she is in, Kai wouldn't do something like that."

"Yeah well, that's what we all thought, right?"