"So when did you- you know- fall in love with her?" Thomas smirked, knowing he had him right where I wanted him, with his head in Fionaland.
"Woah," Newt defeated with his hands up, "What?"
"I may be slow to getting to know things around here, but...
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"Blue," Gally called out, a word sounding more like a color than my own nickname these days unless it came from Newt's lips, "I've been meaning to talk to you."
I sighed, my own disappointment shallowing me. "Before you do, you should know, I'm not exactly the Fiona you remember."
I thought of myself now as a mix of all my past lives. I remember bits and pieces of the maze, with no real understanding of a timeline. I'd read my notebook half a dozen times by now, which helped substantially, but it still didn't feel like enough.
"WCKD wiped my memories again after the maze." I blurted, getting out before he could say another word. I wasn't changed by time like him.
His mouth dropped slightly, he looked at Newt who responded in only a nod, confirming the nightmare I'd been living. "Why would they do that?"
"They wanted me to work for them, alongside them, to find the cure. I guess they knew I wouldn't abandon my family if I remembered them."
"What do you remember?"
"You the most." I smiled. "The strength of our friendship helped a lot, because you were there so much. There seems to be some kind of correlation. Every time you brought me lunch in the maproom, or when you helped me walk for the first time after Ben's sting, it solidified something in my head." It wasn't much information, but it was something. If I weren't so wrapped up in my search for the cure, I might have made more progress, but nothing in my life is built on convenience. I looked over my shoulder to see Newt, lowering my voice a little for the parts he knew less about. "And then... some before the maze..."
"Yes," He nodded, an awkward air blowing between us. "The forbidden relationship of two kids from different trials. The brawn of the maze and the brain of the twin experiment."
I inhaled sharply, confirming my suspicions that he might have gotten some memories back after the traumatic event. A pattern had presented itself with survivors of the sting and near misses with the afterlife. "How much do you remember?"
"After I was stung, small moments came back," Gally explained, twisting his knife in his hand instead of making eye contact with me. "Marcel, your favorite blue lab coat, us... less friend like-."
"Nasty." Frypan shuttered, I didn't even want to look back at Newt's expression. Our rocky relationship was bound to get rockier. I stepped away slowly, getting distance from the others for a more private conversation.
"It's hard to differentiate memories I lost from the first memory wipe and the second. Us most of all."
Gally nodded, sharing some sense of the same tanglement. "I thought about it a lot. Everything makes so much more sense now. Why were we so close so fast? Why was I compelled to protect you?"
I'd never wish this kind of confusion on another. No one should be forced to celebrate getting pieces of their life back. Now it was inflicted on someone I cared the most about.
"Did you really not want your memories back because of me?" He wondered, still willing to look me in the eye.
"It truly wasn't like that." I insisted, angered once again by Tommy's callousness towards Gally. "When WCKD wiped my brain, I felt empty. Not in the way that you would think. It makes better sense now, knowing I was mourning someone I didn't know or remember. Then, when the memories of your death resurfaced... the pit of darkness that felt the presence of, unfolded into a pain I couldn't handle alone. I felt so guilty. What kind of person forgets their best friend is dead? I blamed myself for not pushing harder for you to come with us out of the maze. And everything I was getting back, l didn't want to feel that way ever again. I watched my own horror story that took place long ago, and nothing could be done to change it. I relived all of my greatest mistakes at once."
"I wanted to remember you the most." He admitted it was a secret for only us to know.
In that moment, it was the two of us, the original versions of ourselves. The little lab rats causing amuck in between testings and trials. Back at the time when we were blinded by our adolescents and naivety. Kids, who only worried about the next time we'd get to sneak an innocent kiss in a supply closet.
I was the one to break the eyeline this time, "Did you know there was two other mazes? Groups A and B were the only ones to make it out alive. Everyone we knew from before the maze is dead."
"Marcel..."
"Everyone." I confirmed, still unsure what state of mourning I should be in for the dead brother I once knew, but now never will.
--
The World Wide Web and autocorrect is telling me that "Amuck" isn't really a word. TF it was definitely in Hocus Pocus.
Any apology for lateness will be considered insincere, and I fear I must agree. But please accept this chapter as my way of slowly winning your heart back. I love you all, and pls thank the ppl who post on my page asking for these updates. The request for them pushed me to write.
What would be worse? Fiona and Gally have a relationship redemption arc or Newt dying at the end of this book.
