Countryhumans Oneshots

20. Questions/Requests Pt. 3/? Countryhuman School

Emily_ohno

Note: Sorry if this isn't great, I'm pretty tired writing this... Anyway, enjoy!

Another school year... New class, new teachers, everything was about to change once again. Oh, well, when were new people ever an issue?

Climbing off of the bus, the brand new Year 8-D rushed straight upstairs to their new tutor room (a spacious classroom situated at the end of the Languages Corridor on Floor 5). Curiously, the students gazed first at each other and then at their tutor, a very exhausted-looking Byzantine Empire.

There were a few familiar faces in the class: Japan new Canada, Singapore, Mongolia and the Philippines from the previous years they'd spent together, Poland, Finland, Netherlands and Romania were vaguely familiar with each other (though both friends with Germany and Ukraine already) and the Baltic siblings were still together. In fact, only Somalia was entirely on her own, but being fairly quiet anyway, she didn't mind.

The morning was simply designated for class-bonding exercises. Mr. Byzantine really didn't care what the class did, so - as expected - chaos ensued. Tag, truth or dare, 21 questions, the apple pie game...* they did whatever they fancied! The class had a great morning getting to know each other! It was messy, sure, but when had that stopped any of them from partying?

*[the apple pie game is where someone is chosen to face a wall, then someone else says 'apple pie' in a weird voice. The person against the wall has to guess who said it, and if they get it right, they stay where they are, and if they're wrong, the person who said it takes their place. It's fun!]

Over the following term, the chaotic crew became fast friends, soon bonding together as one massive, idiotic braincell. They loved tutor time; Mr. Byzantine didn't show up most days, so they just mucked around, ruining the classroom for forty minutes!

However, after their first term, life became considerably less blissful. Over in 8-C, a new student had begun at the Academy. His name was the United States of America, and he was immediately the most well-liked kid in school. His sudden popularity angered the two 'cool kids', Russia and his best friend, China. This started full-on warfare, dividing the school almost in half, everyone supporting either one side of the other. Rumours began to spread that Russia and China were plotting their revenge on Ame for his recent whoopee-cushion prank he'd played during the last whole-school assembly, and if they really were out for revenge, it would have to be soon, or they'd be caught planning...

On the fateful morning of 17th November, everyone headed up to tutor, as per usual, except for America, who had made the critical decision to take a pre-schoolwork pee. Watching him from out the corner of his eye, China subtly nodded to Russia, a glint of mischief in his amber eyes, then watched his friend bolt all of the classroom doors shut.

"America.. it's war," Russia hissed, ice-blue eyes glittering with anticipation.

"Bring it on."

***

"Can you smell that?" Finland exclaimed suddenly, sniffing the air curiously.

"Smells like firewood!" Canada muttered, surprised.

"Wonder why?" Japan murmured.

RING! RING! RING! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! EVACUATE IMMEDIATELY!

"... Oh. That explains that, then."

Pulling on the doorknob furiously, panic radiating throughout her voice, Ukraine cried out, "It's locked!"

At these words, the class went into full panic-mode. They were on the fifth floor. They had no key. There was no escape. They smashed the windows, they built a ladder out of left over papier mache, they screamed continually...

They'd tried everything... they were doomed...

"I-I'm calling my brother," Finland sobbed, pulling out a battered Nokia and leaving a terrified voicemail for his siblings.

"Wait!" Mongolia, the strategist of the group, yelled, "The windows are open; let's slide down the drainpipes! Y'know, like fireman poles!"

"Ok!"

"Why not, eh?"

"But it's plastic-"

"LET'S DO IT!"

By some miracle, Netherlands, Philippines and Ukraine made it down safely, with barely a scratch on them. The rest of the class only slipped slightly, towards the end, where the plastic was more brittle. Even so, they didn't fall.

Unfortunately, as the pipes were strained more and more, they got weaker in weaker still; by the time it was Poland's go, they were so feeble that they finally snapped, causing him, to fall the final few metres.

"I-I'm o-ok..." he spluttered, his mouth full of dirt. "W-why did I have to I-land in a m-molehill...?"

"Goodness, there you are!" the headmistress, Ms. Mayan yelled, rushing over to the missing class, "We were worried sick! And...uhm... Finland, you didn't happen to phone Norway and Sweden, did you?"

"Err... yes, Miss. Why do you ask?"

"Well... They showed up at Reception in a stolen fire-truck"

"Oh. They do that sometimes."