THE NARCISSIST'S WIFE

Chapter 17: Guilted

Asslaam alaikum lovelies💕. I hope you enjoy this chapter as much as I did. 🤗🤗

"Aren't you supposed to be in school?" he asked as he stepped out of the bathroom.

He had stayed so long in the bathroom that she began to fear that he had built a house there. But here he was, asking casually as though he hadn't just been caught cheating.

"I wanted to apologize," she blurted out before she could stop herself.

Come on, Zahra. Are you serious? She chided mentally.

"If you would excuse me, I'm getting late for work," he issued.

It was a rebuke, a subtle way of saying 'get out of my room.'

Zahra nodded. She nodded because she couldn't talk. There was a trapped cry in her throat begging to be let out. She feared that opening her mouth will humiliate her more.

Slowly, she placed one foot before the other, marvelling at how her feet could still bear her weight, considering that she felt like a mountain was resting on each shoulder, making her trudge and wobble.

She prayed earnestly that he didn't notice. The last thing she wanted was to fuel his already overflowing ego with her display of weakness.

When she got to the door, she turned in time to see him bring out a fresh pair of clothing from the closet. Laying sullenly on the bed was the set she had prepared for him. She laughed inwardly at how similar their situations were: abandoned.

She unlocked the main door and almost ran into Michael - the cook - who was just about to knock on the door. He brought them their stew, beef and turkey for the week.

"Good morning, ma'am," he greeted but Zahra was not allowed to talk to male strangers, so she looked away, locked the door and jogged down the stairs to the car that had been waiting for her.

Zahra wished she had left 30 minutes earlier. She wished she didn't know what she knew then. Who said knowledge was good? All she wanted was the blissful ignorance that could bring her tranquility. Yes, tranquility. She yearned so much for a dose of it, but the forbidden knowledge she now had would forever be jagged edges to the peaceful feeling she once enjoyed...

***

She had zero focus in school: one could say that she was absent. Absent should adequately describe a person who neither saw nor heard anything in her surroundings. Absent should adequately describe the soulless look emanating from her once-radiating-eyes.

She knew she was a word class fool, but she couldn't help but send him messages or drop-in calls, even though she knew she would meet with an unpleasant outcome. And that was what it was - unpleasant: he neither picked, rejected it nor called back.

At midday, Zahra couldn't hold it in anymore. She burst into tears at the university Masjid. Since she was not allowed to be close to anyone, she had no one to comfort her, so she bore her burden alone.

"Rayuwannan sai hakuri."

Zahra turned to see where the comment came from. A petite girl smiled kindly at her. Zahra blinked and quickly looked away.

Of course, she knew better than anyone how much patience life demanded, especially in marriage.

After a while, out of habit, she texted to ask what he wanted for dinner but he didn't respond.

Night came, and as was the new norm, he returned home very late. Zahra found him in his room reclining on the bed and reading a book.

"Welcome home," he mumbled. He seemed to be finding his book quite interesting because his focus was unwavering.