Konosuba: A D*ck Wizard's Blessing On This Wonderful World (HIATUS)

Prologue: Huh... neat.

Yuuki P.O.V

*BEEEP*

*BEEEP*

*BEEEP*

Oh would that annoying thing shut up-

*BANG*

I fell off my bed trying to turn it off... great. Well at least in the process of that I managed to knock it off the desk along with me, which turned it off as well. A sacrifice of sorts, I guess turning off the alarm clock doesn't come without a cost, hooray for Yuuki, which is me. So with that done I groggily open my eyes and rub the crust that built up in them off, only to notice...

...

Damn, my ass hurts from that fall...

...

No! No! That isn't it! These hands... are way too dainty! Way too slim, trimmed, and moisturized! What happened to my horrendously dry and dirty hands that itch all the time!? What are these!? These hands which don't look masculine at all! In my shock and rapid head turning to examine them, I get some hair in my face which I brush off, only to notice... it's white.

...

I'm not turning old, am I? I look at it and hold it too and I find it's less of silvery gray or old white hair, it's like if the most expensive paint brushes made of pure white hair were stuck on my head. So my hair is white... but not from age? Weird... I would think someone just dyed my hair if it weren't for my eczema free hands. But these aren't even the weirdest parts that I noticed just now. 

The true weirdest part I seem to now have is... boing boing. Yes, I have boobs, tiddies, badonkers, whatever people call them. Hmm... very good sized it seems, I prod at them a bit and it certainly does feel weird to have them just be there instead of the usual y'know... no boobs? With all of these changes I decide to go to my bathroom to have a better look of myself-

...

I feel like my brain has paused a lot recently cause... holy shit... I'm fucking hot! Is it possible to fall in love with yourself?! Isn't this how someone died in some myth?! Why am I so beautiful?! Look at this person who looks straight out of a show, game, or anime! I look perfect! Hahahaha! No more years of being ugly! I'm idol material now!

...

Ahem! I go back and sit down on the couch of my apartment. All I can really say about these changes are... huh, neat. Like, I never really expected them so quite frankly I don't know what to do here. I don't have any stuff for girls, I am- I mean was a sad lonely man in some rundown apartment complex. Do I just go back to a normal life? How do I explain this? What do I even do?

Ughh... so many questions! No one expects to just be turned into a some girl who looks like an angel sent from the heavens itself! I have all of this just given to me out of the blue and here I am living like a shut-in deadbeat! Well... it did just happen a few minutes ago... so I guess I can't be too harsh on myself!

I get up and stretch, nearly having my oversized shirt slide off of me. It seems I've shrunk as well, looks like I'll need to get to fixing and buying a whole lot of things for this unexpected change... with my money count of nearly zero... huh, not neat. But wait a second, what if this is a dream? Am I just hallucinating? I don't want to do anything just to realize it wasn't real.

So what should I do? Do all the things you supposedly can't do in dreams of course! I remember them from that one time I tried lucid dreaming and searched up a bunch of different ways to tell if I'm dreaming! So montage time! What am I even doing... I'm just narrating things in my head cause I'm bored... there is no montage-