"Oh my god he mumbles in his sleep that's actually fucking adorable." Layne said while munching on some popcorn.
"He looks like a baby just wrapped up in his blanket." Brenda said taking a hit of the joint then passing it to Layne.
"I just wanna hold him." Layne said daydreaming about Joel and taking a hit from the joint.
"What are you guys doing. Go to sleep." Glenn mumbled as they were keeping him up.
"Sorry." They both said and still talked about Joel but whispered. Eventually passing out into a nice weed coma thinking bout daddy Joel.
***
The whole group was walking on a railroad track following it to get to ohio where supposedly there's a cure.
"Ok so how do we plan on getting out of here?" Testicles asked.
"Do we have to leave? I mean I'd rather stay here with sexy ass Joel." Brenda stated.
"Honestly same though." Layne agreed with Brenda.
"What about Sebastian back home?" Daisy asked.
"Shit."
"Well?" Daisy asked.
"I think I have commitment issues." Layne said and dais patted Layne on the back.
"Trust me, we been knew."
"At least I'm not addicted to painal." Layne said and Brenda pushed Layne into the ground making Layne face plant into the ground.
"At least it ain't black tar heroin." Brenda said and daisy and testicles eyed each other since they both knew Brenda partook in doing black tar heroin but only on the weekends past 3am.
"Yeah sureeee." Layne said sarcastically also knowing Brenda loves some black tar heroin on the weekends.
"How's grandma doing?" Testicles asked papi, who was pushing grandmas hospital bed.
"She's still speaking in tongues. She has finally stopped believing she's a cult leader though."
"Well that's good the speeches were getting a little out of hand." Daisy said and everyone agreed.
"You think hany is alive if he's here too?" Testicles asked.
"I doubt hany would make it through the apocalypse." Brenda explained.
"He definitely got his ass ate on the first day." Layne said.
"I don't know man, I feel like even walkers, infected or clickers, or even cannibals would have no interest in eating that ass, I mean man's stanky as hell." Dais explained.
"I bet he never once has spread them ass cheeks and washed em' good." Layne explained.
"I bet he has crusty old poop just livin in that crack of his." Brenda said.
"Oh for sure, it's like the Charlie chocolate factory up in that man but like centuries old expired chocolate." Testicles said.
"Fuckin chocolate covered strawberries for days." Layne added.
"I don't think I'd want those chocolate covered strawberries. Chocolate covered toes though? That's a whole other story." Papi said.
"Papi-" layne sighed.
"You'd get AIDS and all kinds of HIV just by being near that ass." Dais explained.
"Your not wrong." Layne agreed.
"Would you guys shut the hell up about hany and his crusty asshole?" Daryl yelled at them he couldn't take listening to one more sentence.
"Somehow you guys are making this hike less peaceful then clickers would make it." Joel said.
"Come join us back here Joel, you won't regret it. We are great entertainment." Layne suggested.
"I'm good, I've got the no pun intended expert over here." Joel said and pointed at Ellie who was holding the book out in the middle of telling one of the shitty puns, but to be fair they were entertaining.
"I gotta fuck that man before we hop out dis hoe." Brenda explained.
"Let's just focus on finding a way out of this reality first." Testicles explained.
"Oh yeah how do we plan on doing that?" Brenda asked.
"I don't know, that's why I keep asking you guys, I've got a life to get back too, we need to figure this out." Testicles explained.
"I'm so ready to start a new life with Joel in this reality." Layne said as they watched Joel from a far.
"Right, like fuck going back home. We have this beautiful man with us right here, what else do we need?" Brenda asked.
"GUYS FOCUS! HOW THE HELL DO WE GET BACK HO-" testicles was cut off by a rainbow coming out of nowhere and touching down on the track in front of the group.
"The fuck?" They all questioned, Joel got his gun out and was aiming it at the rainbow ready for whatever may come from it.
They could hear the song Brittany bitch playing in the distance slowly getting louder and louder till a car appeared driving on the rainbow it sped down it and crashed into a tree next to the railroad track. The car was smoking like a hotbox was going on in that bitch, the window was kicked out by the person inside and they crawled out ass first, then they realized who it was.
"Oh that's just Louis." Testicles said casually and everyone put their weapons down.
"Is it just me or does anyone else feel like Louis is ready for a peggin at any moment?" Layne asked.
"Yeah, no I agree with that statement 100 percent." Brenda said.
"Just look at the faggot." Testicles said and horde of teens ran through and beat the shit out of testicles for being homophobic; then they watched as Louis walked towards them with a slutty strut that screamed "fuck my ass." He moved them hips with each step had everyone's attention with that dumpy dump swinging back and forth. His hair blew in the wind majestically as Brittany bitch was still playing in the car well till it exploded.
"Don't worry I'm here now." Louis said as he pulled his sunglasses off like a model.
"Another mouth to feed... great." Daryl sighed and started to keep walking and everyone followed.
"Louis how'd you find us?" Testicles asked once he was next to them.
"Brendas been leaving notes behind talking about meet her in Ohio for some grade A painal, and I found them." Louis said.
"I'm sorry Louis but if your here for painal it's not gonna happen." Brenda said and Louis just furrowed his eyebrows as he looked at Brenda like she was crazy.
"I wanted to find you guys to let you know I know how to get all of us back to our normal reality." Louis explained.
"How?" They all asked.
"So there's rumors throughout all the survivors that there's the ultimate rat king, we just have to find it. Luckily for you guys it's also in Ohio. Anyways said rat king has a pearl in his heart that will get you back home. We just need to kill the rat king."
"Oh great." Ellie sighed and Joel furrowed his eyebrows.
"What's a rat king?" Joel asked.
"It's like a ton of like different types of infected that are stuck together like rats that have that happen. And boom rat king, it's a big boy." Ellie explained for everyone.
"Sounds like a grand old time." Layne says.
"We are gonna die." Testicles mumbled.
Brenda noticed as panic raced through Joel's eyes just thinking about it.
"We have a lot of hands, I think we can manage." Michonne stated.
"Still will be hard but we can do it if we try." Ellie explained.
"Alright let's keep moving, make as much distance as we can in the day." Testicles explained and started walking and everyone joined.
