Taekook One-shots 💼

I couldn't help it {3}

An image of their life after the event:

Jungkook, during the past 2 years, didn't really have any excitement for anything. The only person he could think about, since the incident, was no one but Taehyung.

Now people might assume that it was Taehyung's fault for not wrapping his head around Jungkook's feelings and think 'Fuck, did I act wrong? Did Jungkook really love me?'

Yeah, he did have this kind of thoughts, though it was too late thus he let go and tried to move on avoiding that something that left him wondering what the fuck he is feeling.

He couldn't distinguish whether he felt guilt or just cared too much about the man.

Jungkook really tried getting his thoughts out of his head by visiting random night clubs, bars, strip clubs and so on. He even tried doing drugs; fortunately he gave them up.

He started getting attached to alcohol and slowly he wouldn't let go of it.

It almost seemed like it was his reason to live.

He reached out to people, trying to pull friends, flirting around etc.

Yet the void wasn't filling up making him feel suffocated. His soul was searching for something he lost and couldn't find anymore. And I guess you are aware of what that is.

It was 3am when he drunkenly walked out of the night club he was in, slowly approaching the taxi a stranger was asked to call for, since he wasn't in the right state.

He reached home after dramatically exiting the door of the taxi and handing the driver money.

"See you soon" Jungkook said to the taxi before clumsily unlocking the door of his apartment and slamming the door closed.

Walking past the living room, which was full of empty bottles, delivery food packets and in other words, a big fucking mess.

No one cared to clean it up though and jungkook was too busy in his depressing thoughts to do that.

He reached his bedroom, removed his shoes almost falling down, but succeeded lying down on the mattress and starting crying.

This was basically Jungkook's everyday routine. Sometimes he wouldn't sleep at all because of his over thinking.

Am I not good enough for you, baby?

Why didn't you let me in?

Why does everyone hate me?

Why are people staring? Am I that much of an embarrassment?

Taehyung, I love you

Return to me, Taehyungie

He kept whispering those words until he fell asleep, his tears drying on his cheeks and him hugging his pillow as if it's his only comfort. Well can't deny that it wasn't.

From the other side, Taehyung had long ago broken up with his then boyfriend.

He was now seeking for something that he himself didn't know what it is. Was it Jungkook? No, no. He would never think of him that way. He already made it clear that he hates him.

But was it actually true? Maybe in Taehyung's way of handling feelings.