You wake up and smile because he's still got his body wrapped around yours. Everything feels lighter now for some reason, and you turn to face him, silently hoping he wakes up. He must sense that you're awake, and he opens his eyes, quickly focusing on you and smiling.
"Good morning," you say, knowing that it's way too early for you to greet him.
"Why are you awake?"
"Really?"
"Good morning," he says, kissing you.
You lay your head on his chest and let him hold you, wishing neither one of you had to go anywhere. "What do we have to do today?"
"Well, first, I'm going to make love to you a couple times."
"Mmm, good," you say kissing his neck.
"Kristen and I have our meeting with the lawyers at ten. Then I thought I could take you to lunch before we go see Stella?"
"You want me to come with you today?"
"I've wanted you there every day. But if this meeting goes according to plan, I'll finally be a free agent," he says, and you can't help but smile to yourself. "I know she'd love to see you."
"If you're sure it'll be okay, of course I'd love to go," you say, but he's already repositioning himself and sliding his hand up your nightie, and you sigh happily as he kisses his way up your body. You help him get your clothes off, letting him look at you more than you normally would. He kneels between your legs, looking down at you and running his hands over your breasts, down your ribcage and belly. You can tell he's thinking about something, but you're too distracted to ask right now. His hands rest on your waist, his thumbs stroking your belly, and you give him a confused look. He comes back to you, bending down to kiss your breasts. "Are you okay, baby?" He shakes his head, but continues moving down your body, quickly diving between your legs. You inhale sharply, feeling a fresh wave of arousal hit you. His answer distracts you, and you say his name again, unable to keep the worry out of your voice.
"I can't talk and do this at the same time, Stevie. It can wait."
"But..."
"Will you stop talking? I'm trying to make you come," he says, and your protests are thrown out the window as he closes is mouth over you and flicks your clit with his tongue. You surrender and tangle your hands in his hair. Just as you're nearing the edge, he stops and you protest loudly, but in seconds he's sliding into you easily. Your bodies quickly find a rhythm, and he lets you cling tightly to him as he loves you.
You feel him watching you, and you cup the side of his face, stroking his cheek with your thumb. "I love you," you tell him, sensing that he needs to hear it. He kisses you hard, never losing his slow, steady rhythm. Your orgasm hits you, and he doesn't stop, still thrusting into you steadily, as you shake underneath him. You wrap your legs around his thighs and pull him even closer, urging him further into you as you kiss him hungrily. He finally releases into you, and the feeling of his body collapsing into yours makes you smile. You touch his arms and shoulders and back, stroking his hair with your other hand as he recovers.
He lays his head on your chest, playing lazily with your breasts, rolling your nipples between his fingers to watch them harden again. "I need all of this to be over."
"What?"
"With Kristen, with Stella... I'm so tired. And I'm about at my limit."
You've watched him. You know it's taking a toll on him, and you wish there was something you could do about it. Maybe after today you can. Maybe things will go smoothly and you can stop being his secret and spend the rest of your life making up for the time that you've lost.
"We'll get through this," you say, and he nuzzles your chest affectionately. "I wish I could make this better, Lindsey."
"You do make it better." He turns to look at you and kisses you again, running his hand through your hair.
At some point, you get out of bed and shower and make coffee, helping him get ready for his meeting. You're probably as anxious as he is, and neither of you speaks very much as you eat breakfast. When you kiss him goodbye your stomach ties itself into knots. You just repeat to yourself that soon he'll be yours. This will be worth it.
You get yourself ready to go see Stella, trying not to be a nervous wreck. You spend hours trying to convince yourself it'll be fine, but you're just not sure. The kids could hate you, They could be angry at Lindsey and it could be a total disaster. Your mind races as everything finally becomes real.
You spend an inordinate amount of time getting ready, not really sure what else to do while you wait. When you finally run out of ways to improve your hair and make up, you start to journal, checking the window for a sign of Lindsey's car ever few seconds.
Finally, you hear a car door and hurry to the front door, opening it as he come up the steps. You see his face and your throat starts to close. Why was he crying? He should be happy. He should be single and happy and yours.
"Lindsey, what's wrong?"
