Sweet & Southern

Mama (Devin)

*BEEP BEEP BEEP!!!*

"Ugh, turn that off!!!"

It only takes me a few minutes and 10,000 beeps later to realize no one's going to because ever since I finished culinary school i've lived alone.

After going back and forth in my head I finally will myself to get up out of bed and ready for another day of hard work.

It's not that I don't love my job, I wouldn't want to be doing anything else but recently it's all become a bit too much.

The funny thing is that I'm a firm believer that "if you do what you love you'll never work a day in your life."

So why has my whole life started to feel like it's crumbling down?

I think I can give partial credit of these feelings to the fact that last night just like I have for the past 3 months I've stayed up till 2 in the morning trying to figure out a way to save my bakery.

Oh and I know what you're probably thinking "A GUY IN KENTUCKY WHO OWNS A BAKERY?!? THAT'S STRANGE!!" well, I get enough flack from my dad and the guys I once went to school with to fill the entire Pacific Ocean so I'm used to it.

It's not a shocking revelation though when you realize that I'm gay and my mama was the one who taught me how to bake and helped me find my life's passion.

Trust me I get flack for that first part too.

It's never bothered me much at least not until I lost my sweet mama about a year ago.

She was my biggest supporter and confidant. She was the only person in the family who didn't judge me after I came out. I loved how she would always be the first customer to walk through the door in the morning giving me a kiss on the forehead before going off to work.

I miss her so much.

I know it would break her heart to see me and the bakery struggling so much, but that's why I'm working so hard to save it.

Baking is the only thing I have left of her and I won't lose that too.

As I walk out of the door after fixin myself up a bit, I recite a little prayer and say good morning to my mom just like old times.

"Dear god I know it's been awhile and accordin to some people we may not be on the same page but please don't let me lose the bakery, it's all I have. Also, take care of my mama up there for me like she told me ya would."

"I love ya mama."