snow on the beach - g. weasley

5. disappointment

supercut - lorde

" but when i reach for you, there's just a supercut "

His face reeks with disappointment. His head lowers and his lips are pressed together tightly, furrowing his eyebrows. I can feel the dismay radiating off him and dispersing into the atmosphere around us. Pain wavered over his face for a split second before it dissipated, a lifeless look replacing it. His eyes were blank, expressionless. They used to be a deep ocean, one with meaning and significance, though now they were an endless void, one that you could get lost in, swimming, hoping to resurface to shore.

A silence filled the space between us. I want to speak up. I should speak up, right? Or is this the opposite of what is right? Should I let him get away? Explain? Try to justify my actions? My thoughts run laps around my mind, as if they were trying to win first place in a marathon.

"George..." my mouth lets a peep slip out. I'm not even sure if he's heard me, my whispering ghost-quiet. My entreating eyes are used in an attempt to get him to hear me out, to listen.

His motionless figure draws me in. What's he thinking? Are we about to fight? Will he walk off? Can I win him back?

"Indiana I can't do this," he begins, "We can't keep doing this." I sense the tiredness in his voice, the crinkles beside his eyes. I can't comprehend the thought of me possibly doing something to make him feel this way. His once full and content heart used to beat, the same heart I destroyed with an axe. I chopped it into pieces like I was a lumberjack and his heart was my tree.

"What can I do to ease your pain, George? Please tell me," I plead, "I want to help!" I say as my legs stride forward.

He takes a step back.

"You've done more than enough" he finishes, walking away from me.

I can't help but watch his figure disappear into the distance, I'm aching, but not for me, for him.

I feel like my heart is on a rollercoaster. Though this is not one where it goes up and down and twists around, it's a straight drop towards the bottom.

I know it's my fault. I'm the problem in this equation. I don't know what I did, but I wish I could go back, relive that night, solve the mystery.

One foot paces itself in front of the other, slowly pondering. The cosy walls of the castle surround me, comfort consuming me. As cliche as it sounds, Hogwarts feels like home. I've spent most of my teenage and adolescent life here, it only makes sense. Chatter echoes around the Gryffindor common room after I say the password and step through the door. The mornings were always filled with life, seemingly quieter on Mondays and the weekend though. I sigh before breaking my stance, and beginning to walk up the girls' dorm's stairs. Once I reach my dorm, my hand comes up to twist the piece of gold metal.

A figure reveals itself in front of me. "Indiana!" Lana exclaims, "Where have you been?" she says. I notice a hesitancy in her tone, almost secret-like.

"Out." I reply, "Why? Worried?" I question.

She coughs, "Yeah! Yeah, I was sooooo worried about you... What did you get up t-"

She's cut off by a clank, followed by obscenities, coming from the bathroom. "Lana...." I start, "What was that?" I query.

"Uh... that was- I'm not sure! Maybe I should go check? Just give me a second" Her medium-length hair sways behind her back as she whips around, heading towards the source of the noise. The door quickly swings open as she pops her head inside, not granting me the chance for even a small look.