Starving for love (Johnny Gaudreau & Sean Monahan Fanfic)

Chapter 10

Another sleepless night, staring at the lightless ceiling. "I made her this way." Dads drunk voice is repeating in my head.

I get out of bed to get a glimpse at my reflection, turning on the lights and looking into my room mirror.

Greasy blond hair, and bright green eyes. My summer tan is fading away. I'm skinnier than the an average person, soon people will start to think I'm not a healthy weight, which I'm not.

If Johnny can love me I can love me right?

"If Sean hates you, you can hate you." Sue says.

Very well.

I go to the bathroom, viewing at my horrid reflection one last time.

"I can't do this." I say with tears falling down my face.

I pick up the razor, and cut as deeply as a can. The pain stings so much & bloods dripping down my wrists.

I took a shower and went back to bed, I get a text from Johnny, "love you goodnight"
I don't see how that boy can love me?

** dreams

"TJ!" I feel someone waking me up, "JT! Get up wake!"

I come out from underneath the blankets and I see a lifeless, pale Heavenly Ross standing beside my bed.

"Oh hey." I say moving up from bed.

Heavenly glares at me, giving me more of a death stare. "How dare you do this to me!" Heavenly screams and slaps my face.

Feeling a cold hand hit my face hard, "What do you mean?" I say acting innocent.

She looks at me as if she wants me dead, "Sean! Sean! You fucking moron!" She says slapping my face again. "Don't pretend to be me or."

I hold on to my face easing the pain,I cut her off "Or what? You're dead." I yell back.

Heavenly's face hardens, "You're going to regret this." Heavenly hissed.

*time skip*

"Sean!" I say jumping into his arms,as I approach him. He hugs me spinning & lifting my feet up into the air as we hugged, feeling like we're the only ones in the world.

"Heavenly I missed you so much." He says holding me close in his muscular arms then bracing for kiss.

The kiss was soft and gentle. Sean took my hand interlocking our figures together as we walked though the park.

"I have something for you." Sean says grabbing something in his pocket, then putting the necklace on me, "TJ had this." Sean says "Why did you take it off?"

"I didn't want to ruin it with paint." I say making up a lie as we walked.

Soon we're walking awkwardly in silence.

"What do you think of TJ & Johnny?" I ask breaking the ice.

"He likes her a lot, but he's not faithful." Sean answered honest.

"Why do you say that?" I examine almost out of character.

Sean looked at me strange, I look back at him with a little smile and his eyes shine bright and soon his smile is against mine.

"How's school going?" Sean inquires as we leave the park going back to his place.

"It's going alright, my grades are average." I say scared of the fact he might ask more questions.

After I long stroll through the park, catching up on each others lives,we arrived at Sean's house. He picked up the hidden key in the cozy chair outside,& unlocked the door being a gentleman gesturing me inside as he holds the door.

Sean guides me through his home leading me to the basement. We got downstairs to see Lance, Josh and Johnny playing video games.

"Head shot!" Josh cheered as he nuggyed Johnny's head.

"Let's just team up on Johnny." Lance says concentrating on the game.

Watching them play poor Johnny didn't stand a chance, being 2 against one.

The basement was dark with only the sixty inch tv brightening up the game room or what Lance calls "the chilling room." Sean takes a seat on the long curved couch on the end not being close to his teammates. I sit down beside him with a pillow in the middle of us. He moves it away and brings me in his arms.

"I have a headache." Johnny says as he gets shot again by Josh.

"Oh yeah, poor sport Johnny Hockey takes losing to the heart and quits." Josh jokes.

"I'm going to get a drink." Johnny says walking upstairs, ignoring his friends comment.

"I'll go with you." Sean tags.

I find myself being Sean's tail, following him around his house. I didn't want to stay downstairs with Lance and Josh.

"So this is Heavenly?" Johnny asked smiling at me, as he grabbed three water bottles from the kitchen fridge and tossed them to Sean & I.

"Sure is." Sean answers hugging me from behind.

"Are you going to bring TJ to the game?" Sean question Johnny.

"No don't!" I nervously shout.

"Why not?" Johnny questions me.

Both the boys eyes are at me, "Because we're not exactly friends." I lie.

"Why?" Johnny canvass

"Reasons." I disclose deliberately.

They both payed no attention to me, talking about tonight's matchup. I pretend to cough, "I think I'm catching a cold, I'll just go home." I say walking out the door.

"Do you want to come to tonight's game?" Sean invites me before I go.

"If I'm feeling well." I say heading out.