𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐃𝐢𝐚𝐫𝐲 𝐨𝐟 𝐚 𝐊𝐢𝐥𝐥𝐞𝐫 (Ash Trilogy #3) ✔️

21

Everybody is a victim of their own thoughts, and I'm no different.

I've slept like shit every single night since Snow told me about what the police believe. I've been staying up all night, unable to get a minute of sleep. And when I do eventually fall asleep from exhaustion, my nightmares of getting arrested haunt me and pull me back awake.

I stare at my laptop screen all day and all night. Waiting for them to make the news public, waiting to be able to read what trails they're following. But they don't. 

As I walk to my meeting, I catch sight of myself in the reflection of a window. My skin is pale, my black hair is messy, and my brown eyes look dead. I look like a goddamn walking corpse. 

My scent is nothing other than coffee since I've been relying on it to stay awake. 

"Hey. I'm here to have a meeting with Misses Milner," I say while tapping my knuckle against the desk.

The woman behind the counter points to a room, and I follow in that direction. 

A woman with black hair, brown eyes, and red glasses sits behind a desk. When I step into the room, she brings her eyes up and smiles at me.

"You must be Lucien Ash! Please, take a seat."

I sit. I don't want to be here, and I'm sure it's clear by my near-dead expression. No amount of caffeine I've drank has been enough to make me truly feel awake. The only thing that does that, is a girl. One I'll remain on the phone with for hours just because I like the sound of her voice. I think if I had her next to me, I could fall asleep instantly, knowing I had the only thing that ever mattered in my arms.

"So," she clicks around on her computer, looking around. "It appears you aren't failing, but one class is close. A paper worth 30% has gotten a 0. Just last semester, you had one of the highest GPAs in the entire university."

She looks away from her computer and looks at me. She clasps her hands together and leans forward on her desk.

"What's going on?" she asks me. "Why this huge drop off in your grades?"

I've been busy killing. Stalking. Being with Snow. Monitoring the death of somebody I killed. 

"Been tired," I respond. 

She hums in response. 

"You're set to get your degree in just a few months," she says. "I don't know what's going on in your personal life, but try your best to focus on this."

Focus on this. Focus on this and not the blonde girl I'm obsessed with.

"Yea," I mutter, knowing I will never stop focusing on Snow, no matter what. 

I stand up. She says something about it being nice to meet me but I just walk out and don't respond, beginning to walk across campus like a zombie once again. 

Why do they think it's foul play? Will they know about our fight outside? Will they suspect me? What if I didn't get all the blood off my key?

It's cruel, to be trapped inside my head. All I can do is listen to these thoughts that eat at my brain and I can't turn them off, no matter how badly I want to. 

I get a text from Snow. It reads, 'Tonight. 7 pm. And bring me a snack.'

I already have the fake document ready. Researching what it's supposed to look like, what it's supposed to say, the font it's supposed to be in, and the paper it's supposed to be on are all pieces of knowledge I now know. I have it replicated to perfection in my drawer.

I find myself paranoid. I'm looking over my shoulder, making sure there isn't a police officer following me. I probably look insane. I eye Marcel's door as I pass it, seeing the blood spew out of his neck over and over again in my head.