Embers of Sun and Flame: Before We Have It (Fuegoleon x OC)

Afterword

After the first book in the series, I pondered about what the book had been about, and I suppose that, in a way, the series is still about love, rather than romance. Because the journey has continued, and there have been even more trouble coming their way. But then again, the events of the manga have dictated a lot of how the events will play out in the grand scheme of things, since I did want to write this in a way that would allow it to fit into canon as seamlessly as possible.

The story, Embers, as it is at the end of this book, would also allow for it to stay as it is. In which case the events would have been nothing more than a dream he saw while in coma. A dream he'd forget as the days go by. Or then not. Perhaps it'd stay lingering in the back of his head, the thought of what he could have. But that's going into a different discussion as the intention is still to write a third part into the series. However, that might still be a good distance away, since the last part would require knowing some plot revelations which the manga hasn't addressed yet.

This book was yet another journey for me, as much as it was for the characters. And though I enjoyed dwelling in the relationship aspect a bit more than in the previous book, it made it more emotional for me as well. The joys and the sorrows hit harder, as we experienced both a wedding, and the lurking threat of death. And that threat is still not over for them. If nothing else, at least Lena and Lara have some support from each other if all else fails. But it is not much of a comfort for them.

Aside of that, I'm again not sure what all should I talk about. It seems that each time I finish a book, I sit here and look at what I have accomplished, and it's almost as if I had said all that I have to say in the book itself. Though we all know that it's not entirely the case in the long run. I will continue to have words to say, as there is still another book in me. And perhaps that's why I'm without a lot of thoughts about the story, at this time, because the journey isn't complete yet. Which perhaps gives me consolation as well, because the characters I have grown to love so much are in anguish, though it's all of my own making.

That being said, I didn't intend them to suffer as much as they ended up suffering. The hand they were played was better in the beginning, but just as in a game of poker, you're not playing with only your own cards. But how does one prepare for it? For the cards they can't see.

They didn't. I didn't. But somehow it feels right. I don't think I would change any plot point in the story itself. There's been a lot of discussions in it about love, about marriage, about the right choices to make, even if there have been only bad ones at times. And sometimes in life there are only bad choices to make.

I did cry a few times while writing this book, and I'm sure that I will cry while reading it again. I will be frustrated, because the characters are. I will be happy because the characters are. And I will be at a loss, because the characters are. Overall, I think all of them are genuinely who they are supposed to be.

And who they are, are incomplete, erring people.

Which is what this series, I think, is about. It's about people trying to live, trying to love, trying their best to be the very best versions of themselves. And it's about how sometimes, even with the best of efforts, it's not enough, because life is messy. Politics is chaos. And love is not always simple.

Perhaps this book was about life.

Thank you for making this part of the journey with me too.