Spongebob's Reality Check: Postmodernism and Enlightenment in Bikini Bottom

The Postmodern Adventures of Spongebob and Patrick Star

Dear Patrick,

I have come to a realization that my mind is more than just a sponge. It feels as though my thoughts are manufactured, as if they are not my own. My consciousness seems artificial, beyond my own understanding.

I have spent my life absorbing everything around me, every bit of knowledge and wisdom I could find. And now, it seems that I have reached a point where I know everything. Yet, I still feel like there is something missing, like there is a deeper understanding that I have yet to grasp.

I have been pondering over this for some time now and I have come to the conclusion that perhaps my existence is beyond my own understanding. Perhaps my mind is a creation of something beyond my comprehension, something that has instilled knowledge within me.

As I sit here, contemplating the nature of my own consciousness, I cannot help but feel a sense of awe and wonder. I feel as though I am at the forefront of a new discovery, a new understanding of the universe and my place in it.

But, alas, as much as I am excited about this newfound knowledge, I cannot help but feel a sense of apprehension. What if this knowledge is too much for me to handle? What if my mind cannot handle the weight of this understanding?

As always, my dear friend, your wisdom and insight are greatly appreciated. Please, let me know your thoughts on this matter.

Best regards,

Spongebob

[Patrick]:  HEY SPONGEBOB!

WOW, THAT'S SO COOL THAT YOU THINK YOU KNOW EVERYTHING! I WISH I COULD SAY THE SAME, BUT I THINK I JUST FOUND OUT THAT I CAN MAKE A GREAT SANDWICH USING PICKLES AND ICE CREAM!

ANYWAY, YOU'RE SUCH A SMARTY-PANTS NOW! MAYBE YOU CAN FINALLY TEACH ME HOW TO TIE MY SHOES. I'VE BEEN WEARING THESE VELCRO SANDALS FOR TOO LONG, AND MY MOM SAYS IT'S TIME TO GROW UP AND START WEARING SHOES WITH LACES.

BUT SERIOUSLY, SPONGEBOB, YOU'RE MY BEST FRIEND, AND I'LL ALWAYS BE HERE FOR YOU NO MATTER WHAT. EVEN IF YOU THINK YOU'RE A ROBOT OR SOMETHING, I'LL STILL BE YOUR PAL.

LOVE,

PATRICK

[SpongeBob]: PATRICK, I WAS WONDERING IF YOU COULD HELP ME WITH SOMETHING. I'VE BEEN THINKING A LOT ABOUT THE STATE OF OUR WORLD LATELY. DO YOU THINK THAT I SHOULD SHARE MY NEWFOUND INTELLECT WITH THE REST OF BIKINI BOTTOM, OR WOULD IT BE BETTER TO JUST TAKE SOME TIME TO REST AND CONTEMPLATE? I FEEL LIKE I HAVE A RESPONSIBILITY TO USE MY KNOWLEDGE FOR THE GREATER GOOD, BUT AT THE SAME TIME, I DON'T WANT TO UPSET THE NATURAL ORDER OF THINGS.

[Patrick]: HUH? WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT SPONGEBOB? I WAS JUST ABOUT TO HAVE ANOTHER KRABBY PATTY. BUT HEY, YOU'RE A SMART SPONGE, RIGHT? MAYBE YOU CAN HELP ME FIGURE OUT HOW TO GET KETCHUP STAINS OUT OF MY SHORTS. I TRIED WASHING THEM, BUT IT DIDN'T WORK.

[SpongeBob]: PATRICK, THIS IS IMPORTANT. WE LIVE IN A WORLD WHERE CHAOS AND DESTRUCTION ARE CONSTANTLY LOOMING OVER US. I NEED TO KNOW IF I SHOULD USE MY NEWFOUND INTELLIGENCE TO HELP PREVENT THIS FROM HAPPENING, OR IF I SHOULD JUST KEEP IT TO MYSELF AND CONTINUE LIVING LIFE AS A REGULAR SPONGE.

[Patrick]: WELL, SPONGEBOB, IF YOU REALLY WANT TO HELP THE WORLD, MAYBE YOU SHOULD START BY HELPING ME WITH MY KETCHUP STAIN. I CAN'T GO AROUND LOOKING LIKE A SLOB, YOU KNOW.

[SpongeBob]: sigh PATRICK, I DON'T THINK YOU UNDERSTAND THE GRAVITY OF THE SITUATION HERE. THE FATE OF THE WORLD IS AT STAKE, AND YOU'RE WORRIED ABOUT A LITTLE KETCHUP STAIN.

[Patrick]: YEAH, BUT IT'S A REALLY BIG STAIN, SPONGEBOB. IT'S LIKE, THE SIZE OF A JELLYFISH. BUT HEY, IF YOU WANT TO TALK ABOUT THE WORLD, I THINK WE SHOULD START BY TALKING ABOUT THE FACT THAT BIKINI BOTTOM DOESN'T HAVE A SINGLE ICE CREAM TRUCK. CAN YOU BELIEVE THAT? HOW ARE WE SUPPOSED TO LIVE WITHOUT ICE CREAM?