When Worlds Collide

Two

My mother smiled, her laugh lines creasing around her eyes and mouth as she gestured for me to sit down. I gracefully slid into the old, slightly worn, dining chair and eyed what she had made for supper. Steaming in front of me was a hearty vegetable soup, most likely made with vegetables she had picked today from Nanna's farm. I smiled wistfully, I hadn't been to see in her in weeks. I worked so hard in the bakery to try and add some money to the little that father made; it was almost impossible to visit the farm save for the odd Sunday when the bakery was closed. 

"Where is father tonight?" I asked, noticing his usual spot at the table was empty. Mother hadn't set out a bowl for him either. 

"He's working late tonight, love. You know that old Tom can't help Nanna as much anymore. I fear one day she will have to sell the farm," Mother replied, a worried look upon her face. 

I dropped my spoon in surprise, "Surely she can't!" I cried, "Whatever will you and father do for a living?" 

Mother gently placed her hand atop of my own to calm me, "Do not fret, we will find something. I am good with sewing, and Mrs. Rogers, you know the lady who owns the clothing shop, she owes me one or two favours." She smiled, though it did not fully reach her eyes. 

"What about father?" I asked, taking a small sip of soup, yet finding it hard to enjoy. 

"Didn't I say not to fret? Your father will be just fine. He will find work, now eat your supper, we do have some things to discuss." 

I frowned, but did as I was told and ate my soup silently. My mind ticked over all the possibilities of what could be said, but I knew that worrying would make no difference as to the outcome. The soup was delicious, mainly filled with root vegetables, it did not taste as fine as chicken soup, but I knew that chicken was not something so easy to have upon the table. The lycans would eat most of the meat sold at market, and livestock was often bred on our farms then sent North up to the cities.

Once finished, I wiped my mouth delicately with a napkin, before turning my attention to mother. "Would you like me to wash up or would you like to talk first?" I asked, folding my hands together. 

"Oh, perhaps we should wait for your father to be home and talk tomorrow," She said, and I frowned at the sudden skirt around the subject. My mother was quite a straightforward person and to have her not wish to discuss something made me rather nervous that the topic at hand was quite serious. 

"Mother, you cannot leave me wondering all night, I shall get no sleep and be far too tired to work tomorrow," I protested. "Please tell me," I begged. 

She sighed, "Alright. Now my darling Josephina, as you are nineteen years of age, it has to come to quite a few people's attention that you are still...well, unwed." 

"Yes, and? I still have a couple more years before I should think about settling down, don't I?" 

"Honey, times are hard for your Father and I, we only have you now and if we were wealthy I would have no qualms about you staying unmarried for a little longer, but truth be told, we are struggling a little and I feel it would do the family well to have you married." 

I simply looked at my mother, unsure of what to say as I knew that once my mouth opened, I would be unable to stuff any unsavory words back in. We hadn't mentioned the 'incident' for a long time and yet I could feel tears pricking the corners of my eyes, so I took a deep breath and tried to hold in my emotion. Wiping my clammy palms on the skirt of my dress, I gulped and spoke.

"Mother, I do not have any suitors to take my hand. Nobody in the village takes much notice of me, I'm just a farmer's daughter," I shrugged. "I understand that times are hard, but I'm working all the hours I can to help you and father, I do not wish to be shipped off and married to some man I don't know, you must know how I feel about that!" I tried my hardest to keep my voice level, but as the emotion in my voice grew, so did my tone. 

"Josephina," Mother sighed, "Please do not raise your voice in this house. As for suitors, dear have you really not taken any notice? Your father has had three this week alone asking for your hand in marriage. Your father really was very kind to you by refusing until we have had this discussion. I've arranged for us to have dinner with the Maloney's on Friday night. Their son, William is really quite keen to get to know you better." 

"William Maloney?" I frowned, "He was a couple of years above me in school. I hardly see him aside from when he comes in every morning to the bakery...oh I see," My train of thought quickly diverted as I recalled how William would order the same thing every morning, just as I was bringing them out of the kitchen. I tried to remain positive, but my willpower was quickly diminishing, along for any hopes I had to marry for love. 

"Mother, I will go to this dinner with you, but I cannot promise that I will fall in love with William. Would you have me marry a man I do not care for?" I stood up from the table and took my bowl to the sink. 

Mother placed a soft hand on my shoulder, "Darling, in a perfect world we could all find love and happiness, but alas that is not always reality, we must play the hand we have been dealt and make the most of everything life throws at us. Not of all of us get such a chance and you know that. William seems a good man, I am sure that in time, you will grow to love him."

"Why do the lycans get to have a soulmate and we must wed for our livelihoods? It hardly seems fair," I protested, well aware that I was beginning to sound like a whining child, but in the moment, I didn't care. 

"That I do not have the answer for. Now go wash up and get some rest. Mr. Windward will not be pleased if you are late." 

I sighed at the sudden change in subject, but I knew that my mother really didn't know why. She was educated, but only in simple subjects like English, basic arithmetic, home economics and agriculture. If you wanted anything more specific, one would have to apply to a college in one of the Lycan towns and even then, it was not at all common for a human to be accepted to study alongside the Lycans. 

I gave mother a quick hug and a peck on the cheek, before I headed upstairs to prepare for bed. Our home was modest, a simple two story cottage on the edge of a winding lane, neighbored by several houses on our right and across the way from us. We were grateful to have two bedrooms, I knew a few of my friends, like Charlotte, only had the one bedroom. Downstairs was a small, yet cosy living room with a kitchen attached. Upstairs there was mother and father's room, my room and a small washroom. It certainly wasn't much, but it was my childhood home and I hated to think I would be leaving its comforts so soon. 

I washed up in our small basin, too tired to wait for the water to warm for a bath, deciding that I would bathe properly tomorrow. I brushed my teeth and relieved myself before releasing my hair from its braid. The feeling of my hair once again free to fall down my back was so relaxing and I ran my fingers through it to detangle any knots. Once in my bedroom, that I hadn't changed much since I was a child, I undid the laces of my dress and stepped out as it fell to the floor, leaving me in my underclothes. I removed those too and replaced them with a fresh pair of underwear and a nightdress. I hung up my dress, knowing I would have to quickly change into it tomorrow, before the sun rose. 

I brushed my hair, as I did every night, before getting into bed. I looked to my side and tried to imagine a man lying there. My bed was too small to contain two people, but I imagined that once I married I would have a double bed like mother and father. Would I cuddle up to him or would we lay away from each other?  I sighed and turned over, I had never been with a man, not that I fully understood what that entailed. It was seen as promiscuous for a woman to lay with a man she was not married to and so my mother refused to tell me. Brietta had tried to explain, but I had been horrified by some of her phrasing and begged her to stop. I would just have to find out on my wedding night.

I soon drifted off into a restless sleep, with mixed dreams that had me tossing and turning. When I woke that morning, I felt even more tired than I had the night before. Could I try and get out of marrying William? Did I even want to for that would mean disappointing mother and father. With a sigh and a turbulent mind, I got dressed for my day. 

"Josephina, you'll be late!" 

I shook my head and shrugged to myself. 

I knew that already.