Clara Spencer

Chapter 17

2017 - Buckingham Palace

Clara's mouth went dry, as she reached the moment she'd been dreading. Blood pounded in her ears and her breaths came faster. Flashbacks of what happened consumed her vision, and she promptly pushed them away. In an attempt to calm down, she furiously rubbed her wrist but found no relief. Prince Phillip and the Queen looking at her with expectant gazes did not help the situation either.

She didn't like to think about this moment in her past. In fact, she often refused to. She'd move on with her life, and there was no point in reliving those dark memories. The only time she would even have to think about them was around June, and only because she'd left her no choice. Clara's actions had hurt June, and in order to make amends she'd agreed to talk about what happened.

Guilt had often plagued Clara when it came to her relationship with her best friend. At times it felt that June contributed so much to their friendship and Clara so little. Yet, Clara was selfish enough to not be able to part with her. So when the opportunity presented itself to gain June's forgiveness and rebuild their friendship she took it.

She never anticipated that regaining June's trust would be its own separate struggle, though. It involved making a big promise and getting matching tattoos on their wrists to symbolize it.

Then, things changed when she learned who her biological mother was. To get June's unwavering support in connecting with the Spencer family and her brothers, Clara had to make another promise.

Tell her family what happened those months after the funeral.

It was a request that she'd thought herself capable of when the time eventually came. That'd she'd somehow pluck up her courage. Except here she was, months later unable to form a single sentence.

"Clara? Are you well, dear?" The Queen said her voice laced with concern.

Clara took a sip of her—now cold—tea and cleared her throat. "Forgive me, I-I just lost my train of thought."

Prince Phillip raised a brow, "I believe you were about to tell us what occurred after the day of the funeral?"

"Yes, of course," Clara nodded.

Silenced followed though as Clara stared blankly still stuck in her mental block.

"Go on, dear, " The Queen prompted.

Clara took a deep breath. "Well...what happened after the funeral was that I..." She drifted off, quickly calculating a decision, "...was that I moved on."

"You were able to cope with your grief then?"

"Yes," Clara lied. They didn't notice though.

Clara was skilled in telling people what they wanted to hear. She'd done it with her parents all the time. This time wasn't any different. The Queen and the Prince surely didn't want to hear the truth. It wasn't pleasant.

She didn't want to break her promise to June, but it was just not the right time. Besides, June never specified when she had to tell them, just that she had to. She would tell them when she was ready.

"I–um–was able to convince June to leave shortly after the funeral. It was that time alone that helped me process my...grief." She couldn't help but touch the tattoo on her wrist.

"Once I sorted everything with my parent's financials, I accepted Jordan's job offer. He'd warned me that cell connection was not always guaranteed, so I decided to visit June at school. We hadn't seen each other in months, so it was bittersweet that we weren't going to see each other for a long while again."