Fairytail- Losing me to Find Me

Chapter 13 - Go

Fear.

Lost.

Control.

Juvia.

At that moment he lost everything and for the first time in his life, Grey felt a sickening cold, his hands trembling turning a pale sickish white. Looking down at his hands, small blue blue blemishes litter against his skin. Is this what Juvia felt? When he froze her. Is this what she is feeling now? Her watery eyes so peaceful filled with tears. This feeling, this pain? Grey leaned against the wall a sickening wave of nausea washed over him realizing what he did, his stomach twisting and a bitter taste rose in the back of his throat. Defeated, he slumped against the wall she ran away from him, his small quiver of control slipped away. Juvia slipped through his grasp, his control taking him with her.

Grey clutched his chest, his mind going numb, his chest heaved with anger boiling within him. She was gone. Juvia left him. Slumped against the wall he took everything in his apartment, glass everywhere, a window smashed and his blood froze seeing a small spot of blood by the door. In that moment, he knew he had lost it all. She was gone and all that was left was destruction. Tears pricked at his eyes as he slowly realized. She really was gone and the rain once so cold and peaceful he knew it was now Juvia's because no natural rain has ever sounded so painful, so full of tears, someone on the verge of death. Nothing has ever compared to that rain, that left a freezing chill on his body, the one that raged and screamed for anyone. It was the rain of a broken heart, flowing through the sky.

She was gone, because of him. Grey slumped forward crying bringing his knees to his chest. He shivered, as the cold had found its way deep inside him, wrapping around his neck and choking him. It was like looking through a foggy window after an April rain, trying to see the shapes of objects beyond but only getting a distorted, cloudy image.

His whole world turned white, and he knew she had finally left him; she was gone. Every single thing and nothing mattered at the same time, as the tears poured down his face as he collapsed to the floor. He had lost his tamer of light.

Or maybe, just maybe this was everything screaming at him, the world and his friends if they ever found out what he did. But he kept it all in, with no one to turn to, knowing that the repercussions of his actions would never bring him peace.

She was gone.

He had lost his tamer of light. And again a click went off, and suddenly his apartment was in shambles. Flipped chairs and broken glasses shattered on the floor, his kitchen was in a state of disarray, and the living room no longer resembled the one that he used to have. In a matter of seconds, all the comforts of home he had worked so hard for were gone, replaced by destruction. The room now cold and unfamiliar, a mere ghost of the comforting space he had called home. As he stood amidst the wreckage, he couldn't tell where he was in life anymore.

For what seemed like hours, Grey replayed in his head everything that had occurred and remembered every detail. He wanted to make sense of it all, but he was coming up empty, his body rigid from the cold, he felt a lump form in his throat, a bitter taste flooding his mouth, trying to breathe. Grey crumpled to the ground, he wrapped his arms tightly around himself coughing. He felt lost, with no path in sight and no way out of the maze of confusion. He needed something to give him an anchor and put the pieces of his life back together again, because Juvia was his path. And she was gone, but she didn't have to be..

Suddenly the world felt cleared and his head that was looking through the foggy window had a moment of clarity as he left his house. He stumbled to his feet, wiping the blood from his knuckles onto his pants. He had to get to Juvia, and nothing was going to stop him. With each step he took, his heart raced faster; nothing would stand in the way of him reaching Juvia.