The day her heart shattered 2

Goodbye, Little One

Kailey's pov

*1 month later- January 31*

"FUCKING HELL!" I yell out.

"Just keep pushing, Kailey. You got it," Dr. Hendrix says.

"Where's Lily and Charlie?!" I ask through the pain.

I am currently in the hospital wing, giving birth to a baby boy.

Once he's born, they'll be taking him away, and I won't see him again; which I'm happy but sad about.

I know it may sound rude and selfish that I'm giving this baby up, but I just can't. Knowing it's his child pains me so much. I can't deal with that.

Yes; it's not fair to the baby, but it's also not fair to me. I can't deal with this pain.

"They're on their way in right now," nurse Abby says.

"AHHH FUCK!" I yell out again.

"We're here!" Charlie says she and Lily both run to my side. Charlie grabs my right hand and Lily my left.

"I see his head!" Dr. Hendrix says. "Just keep pushing! You're doing great!"

"Ahhhh!" I yell through the pain as I squeeze Charlie and Lily's hands.

I hear them both suck in a breath of pain, probably from how hard I'm squeezing.

"I'm sorry gir- ahh fuck! This shit hurts like hell!" I try to apologize for hurting them, but clearly can't finish.

"Ok, his head is out! I need you to give me a couple more big pushes," nurse Abby says while Dr. Hendrix gets the blankets ready.

My breaths are getting heavy as the pain gets worse from each push I give.

"It's ok, Kailey. Just breathe. You're ok. Take deep breaths. In and out. In and out. In and out," Lily says, trying to calm me.

"It's ok, Sweetie. You're almost done," Charlie says as she looks down.

"He's almost here. Just give me two more big pushes and you're done!" Dr. Hendrix is back now.

"FUCK!" I yell out through the pain as I push once.

"Just one more push and he's here!" Dr. Hendrix and nurse Abby say at the same time.

I yell once more as I push one last time, feeling the baby finally be free, and hearing him cry as Charlie cuts his umbilical cord, and he gets taken over to get his first bath, before being wrapped in blankets.

Dr. Hendrix brings him over to me so I can see him once before he's taken to his new family.

"Goodbye, Little One," I say as I lightly touch his cheek.

"They'll give you a better life than I ever could," I feel a single tear roll down my cheek as Dr. Hendrix leaves the room with him, and nurse Abby cleans me up.

"There," she says once she's done cleaning me.

"Now I'm going to have you stay in here for at least another day or two, and then you can leave," and now she's gone as well.

"Are you ok?" Lily asks as soon as nurse Abby is gone.

"Y-yeah, I'm fine. I just hope his new family treats him well."

"Kailey, are you really ok? That's not everything, is it?" Charlie questions.

I sigh before answering. "I just feel bad for him. I know I'm being unfair, but it's for the best. I know they'll give him a better life than I could. But it still doesn't stop me from feeling bad. I should be the one taking care of him."

"I should be the one he calls 'mom.' I should be the one he can always turn to. And yet, this is what I'm doing to him. All because I can't deal with the pain of whose child he is. It's not fair to him, and I'm just being selfish," I begin crying as I put my hands over my face.

"Kailey, it's ok. You're not being selfish. You're only doing what's best for him. You have the right to feel emotional. He is the child you've grown in your stomach for nine months. It'll be ok," Charlie says as she stands up to hug me.

"She's right," Lily says, standing up to hug me as well.

"You have every right to feel this way. Whether you want to say so or not, you are his mother, and that will never change. He will forever be your son, whether he's with you or not."

"Mmm. Thanks girl..." I say as I slowly drift off to sleep, not understanding anything they're saying, and only faintly hearing Xavier and Oliver walk into the room.

I'm sorry my Little One, is the last thing that pops into my head as I let the darkness take control.