Born in the Flame

Chapter Twelve

Hi journal,
   
That appears to be how my brother would start his entries off. He didn't get much of a chance to write in you did he? I guess I'll start writing in you. First, I'll tell you what happened after his last entry. Hopefully, it'll feel like I'm telling him instead of a leather bound journal.
   
A week ago, my brother found Asta and the rest of her family strung up on the ceiling. I don't think Magnolia intended to provoke Svend, but he did. I will never justify his actions, but I think he wanted to get my brother to submit. In all honesty, I don't entirely hate the dawn elves. Magnolia was the worst of them. Some of the guards seemed... conflicted? Is that the right word? Yes, they see themselves as beings higher than us, but the cruelty that Magnolia inflicted on us? No, they didn't fully support it.
   
Anyways, after my brother saw Asta he broke. Not in the way Magnolia intended. No, he nearly took the mountain with him. He burned himself wielding as many runes as he could at once. The first one he aimed for was Magnolia, but he first killed any who tried to protect him. After the first few guards, they stopped defending the noble. After Magnolia died, they all went too. Any dawn elf that was on the first three levels died. All Pa and I could do was watch. I can't stop smelling the burning smell. Once you smell burnt flesh, you won't be able to forget it. Gods, the smell was awful.
   
It wasn't until I found his burnt corpse that I really began to hate the smell. Wielding all your runes is suicide, but it was the only trick up our sleeve that we have that would take the elves by surprise. When he did it, I didn't fully understand. That was until I found you.
   
I didn't realize how much he was hurting. I don't think I would have entirely knew. Shit, he even tried to cover it in his entries. It pains me to say that I'm jealous that Asta knew. She gave him you so that it could help ease it. Before reading his entries, it felt like I had been locked inside of myself. He never had to experience the fight pits like I did, but they made me lock myself away.
   
My Pa and his friends knew what it was like before the dawn elves. They remember when the fight pits were just friendly competition. Not a punishment. For me, it was all versions of hell. The day that I locked myself up was when they put a boy, barely old enough to work, in the ring with me. Up until then, I fought. I gave every person my wrath. When the boy was in front of me, I wish I could say I didn't fight. I wish I told you that I let him win, but I didn't. All it took was a strong punch in the right spot before he was done. When the fight was obviously over, I stopped. The boy was unconscious, so I thought I was done. Magnolia, though, wasn't. He kept me in the ring until I ended the boy, like he knew I'd return to my family absolutely broken.
   
Remembering what happened after I knocked out the boy was hard for me. The only thing I remember was seeing the boy's corpse, beaten beyond recognition. The clanking of the gate, and the sound of metal chains following my every footstep already had me frightened. Remembering the way the gate opened and closed set me on edge. The metal on metal sound caused my vision to start vibrating. It made me feel on edge, like I needed to run. That was until that fight. Nothing affected me after that, but not in a good way. I felt numb to the point where time seemed to flash around me, and I was useless to try and stop it.
   
Reading what he said woke me up. I had no idea that he was looking for a way out of this. I didn't know he did it for me. Would it have made a difference if he did? I'd like to think it would have, but in reality, I know it wouldn't have changed me. What I do know is I intend to continue what he started.
   
Thankfully, he made waves on all the levels. Svend indirectly told every dwarf how weak the elves actually were to stop us in our mountain. I will continue his work on translating the texts. I know where the library is, but I don't think Svend knew I'd seen him climbing around the walls on our level. Maybe this magical blade he was talking about could be the thing completely start the revolution, or at least a well-made replica.
   
Maybe Pa and I will know how to translate it. I hope we can, if not, I'll rally us all together and make a blade for them all if I have to.