Born in the Flame

Chapter 23

I figured out where we were the next day. I was still without sight and the pain of being alive consumed me, but I had calmed down from being in utter shock. I could handle the small things like gentle touches, small noises, and simple foods. Anything beyond that was too much.

Birch, or rather Uzlos, had been taking care of me. If things had become too overwhelming, he knew he didn't have to ask anymore to hold me. It was pathetic, the existence I had come into. I couldn't see anything in any kind of light; but even at night, when the soft sounds of crickets came out, my vision was only that of blurred shapes.

Uzlos had told me his real name at some point. He apologized for not telling me sooner and that he was going to tell me the night everything happened. I didn't care. Whether his name was Birch or Uzlos Círdan Birchwood, I didn't care. All I wanted was to either feel nothing or the sensitivity to everything to be dulled. My current state led me into a pit within myself. I wanted to die, but everyone else wanted me alive. Even those above the gods and death himself wanted me to endure this suffering. Needed me to endure it. So, I did.

We stayed where we were for the next few weeks, slowly introducing me to more things that would require more use of my senses. Herbs were cooked with whatever meat Uzlos made for us, he would speak more above a whisper and left fragrant flowers at my bedside. The one thing that held me together during these experiences was him holding me through it all. I cried when I smelled the flowers, tasted the food, and heard his voice being spoken above a whisper; the moment he cradled me as if I had been just ripped from the womb I would start to calm down.

Mird told me I'd be free from the old bonds and reborn to new ones. He got the reborn part right. I imagine this is how an infant would feel about experiencing life for the first time. As time passed though, opening my eyes to see light didn't trigger me as much, tasting herbs didn't make me vomit, and smelling flowers didn't give me a crippling migraine. Just as I had told myself in the void, it would pass, as all things did. My abrasion toward anything became duller and duller through time and a lot of patience on Uzlos' end.

"I think I'm ready to go back." I said on the fifth week we were in that rundown manor.

"Are you sure?" Uzlos asked quietly. He sat beside me in front of the fireplace that held a small spit for roasting meat.

"I can see again and I can stand to smell, eat, and touch. Yeah, I think I'm okay to go back." I replied, "I don't think I can stand to be here anymore."

"I suppose you'd prefer to leave at night." He assumed. I nodded my head in confirmation.

When I first began to see things past my hazy vision, I could tell in my reflection that underneath my bottom lip, I had a white tattoo of a symbol I didn't recognize. Another new thing was a white streak of hair now fell around my gaunt, sleepless face. Yes, Mird had given me a gift. That gift meant I'd look a little like him. I couldn't help but feel like it was a bit narcissistic.

"Again, are you sure you are okay to go back?"

"Yes. I am." I repeated.

"If you're sure, I have to confess a few more things that I've been withholding from you until you were ready." He sighed, "Honestly, it'll be better if I show you."

I looked at him, confusion spreading across my brow. Uzlos motioned for me to follow him outside, I could see the faintest pinks and oranges coating the sky. Standing, I obliged him and moved to where he was.

"Okay, before I show you, I want you to know that what I become will not hurt you."

"Okay?" I replied, still questioning what he was about to show me.