Control

Merlin paced around the floors of Arthur's room gnawing on the side of his finger. The King rolled his eyes as he watched the other pace.
"MERLIN!" Arthur snapped, feeling a mix between guilt and pride as Merlin startled. Arthur watched in fascination as his sorcerer's eyes flashed gold before returning to their normal blue-green. The King frowned, stood up from his chair, and walked over to Merlin.
      Merlin made a wounded sound under his breath as the King lifted his chin. He tried to pull his face away from Arthur not wanting to make eye contact. Eye contact with his king, especially when Merlin was upset, opened the floodgates. Pulling away was futile, instead, Merlin closed his eyes tightly, ignoring Arthur's orders to open his eyes. Rough calloused fingers-being a knight will do that to you- prodded his jawline repeatedly. The brunet shoved away the hands with another flash of golden eyes.
"Arthur. Knock it off." The man huffed with an agitated look on his face. The more Arthur prodded and pried, the more Merlin's control of his magic faltered. It begged to be let out to rage and destroy but its master refused. It wouldn't be long before Merlin's weak grip on his magic loosened. The King rolled his eyes and grasped Merlin's face in both of his large hands. The sorcerer ground his teeth and tried to pull away from his king once more. Arthur moved his hands from Merlin's face to the sorcerer's shoulders instead. He tried to pull the blue-green-eyed man into a hug but it only seemed to agitate Merlin more.
    Merlin shoved Arthur away and stalked over to the other side of the room. His eyes turned gold and a sudden wind picked up in the room. "Arthur! Don't touch me." He snapped. He tried to ignore the hurt that flashed across his king's face.
The blond took a step toward Merlin with his hands raised placatingly. The wind in the room picked up knocking empty goblets and blowing loose papers around the room. The King took a step back, watching as the wind continued to swirl objects and items across the room. His sorcerer's eyes looked eerily at him; a blank gaze filled with liquid gold. What was wrong with his Merlin? The strong wind was still whirling and Arthur let out a startled yelp as a stray goblet bounced off his temple. Arthur grumbled under his breath as he rubbed his now aching head. His sorcerer was pacing back and forth once more; with every turn, the wind grew stronger. Arthur walked toward Merlin with a heavy frown.
    "Merls?" The whispered nickname was enough for Merlin's carefully constructed walls to fall. Along with the walls, Merlin fell and was barely caught in time. Arthur cradled the back of Merlin's head with one hand while the other wrapped around the brunet's waist. Merlin curled into Arthur's hold, his back was heaving, objects were still flying, and the wind was still growing in speed. Arthur was mumbling sweet nothings with a voice as soft as silk to Merlin who with every word leaned into Arthur more and more.
After a few moments of allowing himself comfort, Merlin pulled away from his king and stood up resuming his pacing. In addition to his golden eyes, tears now streamed down his face and he didn't bother wiping them away. He stopped pacing to stare out into the courtyard watching as the commoners and knights went along their daily routines. As Merlin stared out the window, he let the goblets and flying papers fall to the ground. His gold eyes faded back to their blue-green gaze. What had he done?
    "Your majesty?" Merlin turned around to face the king. The side of Arthur's head was wet and sticky with blood from where the metallic goblet had hit. The sorcerer gasped and rushed to Arthur conjuring a warm wet cloth as he did so. Merlin ignored the way Arthur tried to stop him from tending to him.
"Merls, you're no longer my servant, you don't have to clean me up." The King insisted on grabbing the shorter man's hands. Once Arthur saw the tears streaming down Merlin's face, he dropped the other's hands and cupped his face instead.
"Merlin?"
"Arthur," was the whispered response.
"Tell me what's the matter, love? You've never lost control of your magic like this. Merls, what's the matter?"
"Nothing." Merlin thought that answer would suffice despite the tear tracks on his face.
"Don't bullshit me, Emrys."
"Even though magic is allowed now and I no longer have to prove myself it still feels like I need to. How can I be the royal sorcerer and yours properly? What if I mess up? What if my position brings more enemies against you? What if-" Merlin was cut off by soft lips on his.
"Merlin."
      "Yes?"
"Shut up and stop thinking. Allow yourself to cry."
"There's just one more thing I have to do." Merlin reached out a hand and the cut on Arthur's temple disappeared with a whispered healing spell. Tears clouded his eyes as he looked into Arthur's eyes.
The King stared right back. He watched as the bright candle lights glinted and shone off of brilliant teary blue-green eyes; his breath caught in his throat. How could someone be so pretty when they cry?