Waking up Blank [Published - sample only]

3: "Kill being the key word."

There was an empty feeling inside of me, and it wasn't that I couldn't remember anything except two people and a small moment in time. I felt like I was missing something. Something that I never took off or always had with me, but whatever it was was gone, and I had no idea what it could be. It wasn't that I had lost my best friend either, it was something that I just always had. Something was missing, but what?

I rubbed the back on my neck in thought as I glanced around the room. There was a slight chill sent up my spine as I heard the stairs creak from somewhere in the house. I glanced at my door expecting someone to be there, but I didn't see anything. I didn't like being home alone, I don't think I ever did, or maybe I did and something changed that. What would have made me feel uncomfortable in my own house? I asked myself until my thoughts returned to what was missing.

Did I wear a necklace or a ring? What about a bracelet? I wondered as I continued to scan over my belongings. Could it be a book or a bag? I thought as my eyes landed on objects around my room. What was it? I repeatedly asked myself. It was something my subconscious mind clearly missed having around because I couldn't shake the feeling. It had been bothering me since I came home yesterday, and when I asked my parents they didn't seem to know what I was looking for.

I started to tear my room apart looking for whatever I was missing, but I wasn't sure on if I would even know what I was looking for when I found it. I started to take pictures off my wall, pulled everything out of my drawers and closet, and unmade my bed. The only things that remained intact after my desperate search were the light purple walls, and the floor boards, other than that the room was in complete disarray. The mattress was off the bed, leaning up against the wall, clothes were scattered everywhere, some even in the hallway outside my door. Drawers remained open, the clothes torn from them, the closet was empty, and it's contents were scattered around the room. My desk was cleaned out, with the pile of office supplies laid on top of it, along with a blue gaming device that I couldn't remember how to operate.

"What the hell happened in here?" a voice asked behind me. I turned around to see my brother, a tall lean boy who was easily a foot taller than I was, standing behind me. From what I was told, he and I rarely got along, but I couldn't see why since he had been nice to me when I came home.

"Hi Joey. I'm missing something," I said opening my arms in a gesture to say 'but I don't know exactly what I'm missing.'

"I can see that. It looks like you've lost your mind!" he practically yelled as he raked his fingers through his hair in a frustrated manner and glanced around the room. I wasn't sure why he was angry, it's not like he did it. What was so bad about it?

"I need to find it!" I said with force, hoping to make myself seem tougher than I felt right now. I didn't like him yelling at me, it sent fear into my for some reason like he was going to hurt me. He was family, why would he hurt me? I should have no reason to be afraid of him, but maybe in the back of my mind I remembered that he and I didn't get along and like the nurse said it was second nature to know that I didn't want him angry at me.

"What are you looking for?" he asked, attempting to calm us both down before whatever was going on got out of hand.

"I don't know," I said hesitantly. I heard him sigh, clearly it made him upset that I wasn't more help in this matter, but what else could I do? I had no idea what I was looking for, and I needed help. "I know it's something important to me. I'm lost without it, I need it, something similar to that. What's important to me?" 

"Your best friend necklace with Maddie?" he suggested with a shrug of his broad shoulders.

"I found that on the dresser," I said as I pointed to the half heart I found with 'be' and 'frie' on it. I wasn't sure exactly what it spelled when I found it, but I had guessed correctly that it was meant to spell best friends. "Why would I take it off if it's important to me?"