Waking up Blank [Published - sample only]

6: "Why do funerals have the word fun in them?"

I was dressed in all black right down to my shoes. This was according to Ali's specifications of what was appropriate to wear to a funeral. The black sleeveless dress which Ali had picked out of my closet was the only one I had, I had supposedly lost the other one when we had to travel for the last family funeral. She said that I left it in the closet, and didn't realize it until I got home and started packing. I guess I was forgetful normally too, but now I was just an extreme case.

"You look beautiful," Ali said after finishing my make-up. Ali had made sure my make-up was water proof because it was definitely going to be needed today. She got up and left to finish getting ready before it was time to go. 

"Thanks," I said. My voice was meek, and shallow as everything seemed to hit me at once. My best friend was dead, I knew no one around me, and I was going to a funeral where people thought I had killed her. Not that they'd admit it, but I could see it on their faces. They would either glare at me with hatred, or sorrow. They couldn't decide whether or not to hate me or feel sorry for me, but I was sure that most just hated me like Maddie's parents did.

"It's time to go or we are going to be late!" my mother yelled from downstairs.

I could hear the collective sigh in everyone's voice when they spoke about the funeral. They were worried that it would break me, and that I wouldn't recover. As I looked at myself in the mirror, I shared the same worry. My face was already pale, and I still looked weak from the four months in the hospital, but I had to be strong. No one was looking forward to this, but it couldn't be avoided. We had to witness a mother bury her baby, the same baby that was supposed to grow up, go to college, get married, and have children of her own one day.

Maddie was supposed to out live her mother, just like all children should plan to, but it didn't work out like that. I sighed as I grabbed the white roses from my desk, Drake and Andrew had told me that they weren't her favorite, but when they told me that white roses stood for purity, innocence and friendship, I had to get them. Those were all things I considered Maddie to be from the limited memories I had of her, and I wanted everyone to have those thoughts of her today.

"It's time to go," my father said quietly as he held the door open for me to leave. I nodded slightly so that he knew I had heard him as a sad sigh escaped my lips and I hoped that I could make it through today. I needed to do this for Maddie, she deserved that much. I got up and followed my family out of the house into our van. No one spoke as we got in and no one spoke during the car ride.

We were as silent as a graveyard, I shivered as the thought raced through my head.

We were all trying to brace ourselves for what was going to happen. Our minds were on the worse case scenario, just to make sure we prepared in our own ways. Of course we couldn't have been ready for what was coming entirely, we wouldn't have been able to plan for everything.

My family took a collective breath as we started to exit the car. I was the last one out of the car, and should have gone unnoticed since people would have stopped looking at the newcomers after a few seconds, but I instantly caught all the attention from a majority of those outside the funeral home. They had stopped whatever they were doing, whether it had been talking, parking or walking, and looked at me. They made no attempt to hide it, they were blatantly staring at me, unsure of what to do. How rude, I thought to myself as I glanced around the crowd.

A few people had taken a slight step back, or leaned backwards to put distance between us, even if they weren't near me. There was a slight squint in their eyes, a flash of disgust that swept across their faces before they could conceal it, and there was a glint of anger that shined brightly in their eyes. These were the ones that showed their true thoughts about what happened the night Maddie and I were attacked.