Waking up Blank [Published - sample only]

8: "The Gray's brought charges against you."

Jared had picked me up from my house earlier this morning when my family left for work or other friends homes. They didn't feel safe leaving me at home alone, that I couldn't fend for myself, or that I would injure myself. I sighed heavily as I got out of his car, thinking back to a conversation I had heard my parents having a few nights ago.

They were worried about how I would be affected if I remembered what happened that night. The doctor had said that my amnesia was preventing me from reliving the event, protecting myself from whatever happened, but what would happen if I remembered? They feared the worse, and while I had to look up a few of the words they had used, I knew that they were just worried that I would meet Maddie again, but on my own occord. 

Suicide. A simple word with the most complicated explaination.

They worried that I would remember, and then try to end the suffering. Then they worried about if I was faking, and that hurt worse than anything. It must be hard to hear that your daughter doesn't remember you, or the family, but to suggest that I was faking wasn't right. I wasn't faking, I really didn't remember, but it must be hard to hear that. I wonder if Maddie's parents felt the same way when I said I couldn't recall what happened that night. They would never know what happened to their daughter if I didn't remember, but at the same time, did I want to remember?

I had heard the nurses talking, seen photos of what I looked like after being admited to the hospital, and had ghost pains that told me that I had lived through something horrific. How would that affect me? To know the truth, and know what actually happened instead of the speculation that everyone cast on that night, that could be too much for anyone to handle. 

"Chelsea?" Jared called, regaining my attention and pulling me out of my thoughts. "Are you coming?"

"Yeah, I'm coming," I replied reaching down to get my backpack from the front seat. 

Jared had packed it for me before we left. He said I brought it everywhere with me, never left home without it because it was filled with my favorite material possestions, that I currently didn't remember how to use. There was a music player, an Ipod as he called it, a camera that had photos of all our friends stored inside, a journal to write in, and a water bottle since he said I didn't drink soda, so I carried water with me everywhere.

I walked up to Jared's front door, where he was waiting for me, and followed him inside. Even though he had told me that I spent a lot of time here, I didn't recall anything when I entered the home. I didn't get memory flashes, I didn't recognize anything, but there was something familiar about it, and I welcomed that.

"Chelsea!" I heard a female voice call.

I turned to see an older women with Jared's black hair coming toward me with her arms outstretched. She enveloped me in a tight hug before looking me over. A smile formed at the corners of her lips, and spread across her face. 

"It's good to see you again," she said with a motherly smile that made me feel safe for the first time since leaving the hospital. "I haven't seen you here without Maddie in ages, I think it was when you two were planning her surprise party. It was so cute, neither of you are particularly sneaky, I think she knew about it, but she acted surprised and even went along with the lie that you and Jared had been seeing each other and just wanted time away from her."

"Mom," Jared cried, suddenly looking very nervous. "Chelsea doesn't remember anything, she has no idea what you're talking about." His reply was quick and to the point, and stammering as he spat it out as fast as he could. 

"Oh right," his mim said offering me a soft smile. "I'm so sorry, I forgot about your amnesia to be honest. You've been here for years, I just thought you'd remember something. It's truly my fault, don't worry about not remembering. I can reminise about you and Maddie by myself."