Two training idols meeting for the first time. A friendship blooming against adversity.
The birth of WooSan.
***
"And then, you will go home and you will think of daddy, will you?"
His voice tone makes my heart sink already, and I kind of regret asking him to tell me straight away what he wants to do with us. Well, not regret it, but dread the answer, yes. Wooyoung sure knows how to be blunt and I'm not sure I can take it right now. But I have to be strong. He looks me dead in the eyes and never smiles when he talks.
"I never wanted us to end like this. Bitter to one another and without a kind word. I also didn't think we would be so dependent on Ateez for our outcome, but it turns out we are. When I froze at KQ during our performance, I panicked. I realised you guys are better off without me, my failures and my own insecurities. I can't drag you down with me. And I'm talking both about the group and about you, San. You're a good guy, I am not. Well, maybe I am, but I am baggage, not the other way round."
"Basically, you're telling me we're done not because of something wrong between us, but because you think you're a bad influence and whatnot?"
"Read it however you want. I just know you would be better off with someone else. You're stupidly handsome, perfect boyfriend material, you will find your person in no time."
"I already found my person. It's you."
"You asked if and why we were done, I told you. Don't make it more difficult than it already is."
"I'm sorry, but I don't accept it. If you told me I was just a fling and it passed, or that you couldn't get over what I did today, I would get it. But not this. Not you battering yourself over your insecurity which we as a team could work on, together."
"My weaknesses are my own, only I can work on it."
"Wrong again. You have stage fright? We can schedule performances with family and friends to make you accustomed to crowds. We can regularly train in front of other people. We can do this, Wooyoung. We all got you. We need you. I need you. Don't give up on us. Don't give up on me. Before being your lover, I am your friend. I want to be your friend first. What kind of friend would I be if I wasn't by your side when things get tough? Now they're tough. And now I'm here. I'm going to drag you back to our dorm if I need to, but I'm not going to let you throw your career away over one misstep."
"So, you're going to disrespect my own opinion? Disregard what I just said?"
"Yes, because you're not seeing the situation clearly."
"You're a dick."
"And you love it. Don't you?"
He finally flashes a blushing smile, and puts his right hand lightly over my chest.
"I missed you so fucking much, San. I didn't want to admit it even to myself, but I did."
I don't think much. No, I don't think at all. After his words, my instantaneous reaction is to finally, finally kiss him, after weeks of longing for his lips, his soul. I kiss him and at once I feel my heart sing again, I feel at peace again, I feel complete again. We stop for a second, our foreheads against one another, our breaths meeting halfway, then we can't but begin another kiss, passionate and desperate and kind.
"Come home with me, Wooyoung. Come home."
***
𝕎𝕠𝕠𝕪𝕠𝕦𝕟𝕘
My heart is racing in my chest, so much I fear it's going to explode any moment. I haven't felt so alive in weeks. I can't deny this feeling, this is where I belong. This is where I have to stay. San is right. I can do this. I can work on anything, if I accept the help of the others. If I accept the fact that I'm never alone, and I never will be.
I can't possibly go to my brother's tonight. I want to stay with my friends. With San. Apologise for my behaviour, clear up where I stand, what I want to do. I need to call me, and tell my cousin he has to go home alone as well. He will understand. I smack a tiny kiss on San's cheek and I enter the main door, where everyone is waiting to know the outcome of our conversation.
"Min Joon ssi, I'm afraid you will have to go home on your own tonight. Would that be a problem?"
He smiles widely, probably understanding the whole situation. "Not at all, Youngie."
"Thank you. A lot. Let me call Dongyoung now. I'm not returning to his place tonight."
While I make my phone call, I can see Yeosang and Hongjoong hugging each other and jumping from joy. It feels comforting to be so loved. I thought my friends would be mad at me for my shenanigans, but it turns out they're happier to see me back than anything else.
"Everything is set. I don't have my stuff, but I will survive for one night... if you guys will have me."
"Don't even mention it. It's your home too. It will always be." Hongjoong comes to me and puts an arm on my shoulder. Yeosang smiles at me and so do the others, who have now arrived from the dance floor. "I propose we all now go. We have many things to talk about and it's late already."
We go outside, waiting for our taxis. We can't stop looking at each other: we're again a group of 8, we're complete again, and we can feel it. There's something magical about us. Something just right that we can't deny nor ignore. I know I won't do that ever again. I almost lost this over my insecurities before my person reminded me how much it means to me.
Here's to us. Here's to Ateez.
***
Author's note: less angst, more cuteness today! Our boys are together again. 8 makes 1 team guys, there is no changing this ❤
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