The Dream Lives On

Authors note: Kay, this is all non-fiction, but based on real life. It's just a little twisted up. My dad was a racer before I was born, then when I was born he had to start paying for me and everything and ran out of money to race. My mom told him she was pregnant right before one of his races, and he ended up winning that race <3 it's in my blood. I was living with him ever since him and my mom split up this year. Then I got into selfharm really bad, and I was sent to the hospital. I ended up getting in a fight with my dad before I left. He never visited me the whole time I was in. I thought it was because he didn't care. But instead he never went cuz he thought I wanted nothing to do with him. Anyway, then I moved in with my mom. I hated him for months. Never talked to him. I never forgot about my racing dream though. I watched all the NASCAR races, wishing I was there. I had plans on moving out at 16 back to peterborough to race. I didn't know how, but I just had to. Then today, I had a dream where me and my dad were building a race car together. It seemed so perfect. Then I broke, I was always a daddy's girl. I knew I couldn't go without him. I messaged him today and we got into a conversation about racing. Now I have plans on finally moving back to ptbo to race. <3 Wish me luck. Btw, the picture of the story thingy .. Is actually my dads stock car <3

"But-" 

"That's it! For the last time Rokai! You are not moving back to peterborough to race. That's a stupid dream your father got in your head. Enough of this talk, I don't want to hear another word! You've only been here a week, just give it a try." And with that she slammed the front door and continued to walk to her car. I sat down on the couch and began sobbing. Racing is my dream. Why can't she understand this? I layed down on the couch and closed my eyes. I just want to race..

--

"Hey dad! I'm almost done!" I said, beginning to cover the back bumper with baby blue paint.  

"Looking good Hun, soon you'll be out racing this baby. Two months until opening ceremony." My dad smiled 

I set down my paintbrush and stood up highfiving my dad, then going into our handshake.  

"You talked to Andrea about the numbers right? She's got them all printed out?" 

"Oh yeah! They're right here!" My dad walked over and pulled four huge, shiny numbers out of an orange envelope. He handed them to me, and instantly a huge smile grew on my face.  

"Just like I imagined them!" I placed them on each side of the car.  

"Good old 23, take care of her." My dad smiled, running his hand over the number.  

"Same number, same dream, new car. I'll be in, in 20, unless you want to help me get the seat inside and hook up the harness. The paint is done. Once the seat is in, all I need to do is put the steering wheel in, and put the net up." I said grabbing the steering wheel and holding it up.  

"Sure i'll help. Then we can start it up and see how she runs." 

I smiled. Time flew by, and she was all set up. We stood back and took in what we finally created. Dad started up the engine and we listened to it roar. He let me sit inside. It was a feeling I'd never forget.  

"Daddy I love it." I smiled, holding onto the steering wheel.  

"Me too," his phone rang. "One sec Hun." He answered the phone and walked off.  

I just sat there pretending I was racing. He came back 5 min later, with a look on his face, almost like he was gonna cry.  

"Pack your stuff kiddo." 

"Where are we going..?" 

"Your mom won."

--

I jumped up off the couch. Almost in tears again. Flashbacks. I looked over at the pictures on the wall. I grabbed all the ones of me and threw them to the ground. I watched as the glass shattered. I ran upstairs in tears. 'I need to be with my dad. I need to race. I had everything. I spent so long working on that car. If i cant race, then whats the point of life? Why did my stupid mom have to win? Im gonna run away.' I kept saying in my head. I was gonna run away, thats what every kid does when something goes wrong, but I have too. I grabbed a paper and began writing:

'Dear mom & Devon, 

I can't do this anymore. I need to race. I need to be with dad. 

Don't bother looking for me. I'm 17 years old, I'll be ok.  

Maybe one day, when I make it to NASCAR, 

You can come to my race. 

Until then, don't bother contacting me.  

I love you.  

-Rokai'

I read it over a million times and started packing my stuff. I don't know where I'm gonna go. I just need to go. I need to be in my hometown. I grabbed my spare key, incase I couldn't make it. I also grabbed some cash, and headed out the door.

Day 1 - 1 month & 3 weeks to go.

AN: Kay, this was VERY short. I just wanted to get the basic shit out xD and I can't use bold or italics or anything cuz I'm on my friggen ipad. So bare with me. <3 I love you my lil gumdrops ^^ Ill try and edit it on my laptop when i can <3