me on my full potential of stupidity: countryhumans edition

(old) ships

(Contains Amephil, aswell as Russia x Reader. )

NOTE - I DO NOT SHIP AMEPHIL AT THE CURRENT MOMENT.

POINT OF VIEW: you and russia were stalking philippines since he......ahem..ed..yesterday. you dragged Russia into whatever the absolute fuck of a stupid situation you got yourself into first because Russia is in need of touching grass at the moment.

▀▄▀▄ (𝒘𝒐𝒐𝒘𝒐𝒐𝒘𝒆𝒆𝒘𝒆𝒆 𝒗𝒆𝒓𝒚 𝒄𝒐𝒐𝒍 𝒕𝒆𝒙𝒕) ▄▀▄▀

apparently Philippines was looking through his cameras on the tv with a deadass flat face (probably because someone slapped his goofy ass with a pan using some ooh ooh cartoon logic but whatever).

he was looking through the cameras like how you would play any fnaf game. alright, his behavior explained the beer bottles in his room. there were a shit ton of them.

you then saw a dark figure in his cameras that he somehow didnt notice and like those absolutely pathetic excuse of a spy in children shows you shook Russia out of his comfort zone. yeah more like you interrupted his "𝑣𝑒𝑟𝑦 𝑓𝑎𝑛𝑐𝑦 𝑑𝑖𝑛𝑛𝑒𝑟 𝑤𝑖𝑡ℎ 𝑎 𝑏𝑙𝑎𝑐𝑘 𝑟𝑎𝑡 𝑡ℎ𝑎𝑡 𝑖𝑠 𝑎𝑙𝑠𝑜 𝑠𝑖𝑐𝑘 𝑎𝑛𝑑 𝑎𝑙𝑠𝑜 𝑟𝑢𝑠𝑠𝑖𝑎'𝑠 ℎ𝑖𝑔ℎ 𝑜𝑛 𝑑𝑟𝑢𝑔𝑠" time. yeah nonsensical i know but there was literally a small miniature table with a rat sitting on top of it and Russia was...

ah, nevermind that.

anyway, as you were watching Philippines from afar, somewhere near his house where you weren't able to get caught by the cameras, that certain dark figure reveals itself to be...America.

America then suddenly broke into Philippines house, breaking through a window instead of breaking the door and just suddenly spoke—

"hey u wanna go out or sumn"

asked America calmly.
Philippines let out the world's longest inhale as a response,

and three hours later replied with a

"get the fuck out of my house."

—

you on the other hand with Russia, only watched in disappointment. except that russia was smoking weed and is suddenly choking a fucking eagle at two in the morning and that he would probably pass out in less than a minute due to his sheer disappointment.

and then he did.

rip bozo.