Sharing Life

28. Dil Hain Ke Manta Nahi

Priya turned off the internet and slide aside her phone.

"Are you crazy? What was that?" she screamed and hurried to her bed.

Her heart pounded, lips parting in effort to form words. It happened again. Once again she had lost all the sensibility.

How? Why?

Maybe she had taken her sister's go-with-the-flow advice little too seriously, now causing havoc in her life.

"Or perhaps the dosage is heavy," she stuttered turning to the side table while clutching the edge of bed with trembling hands. "Yes. It's all because of these. This, along with Mr. Kapoor's kindness and Sara Di's TED talk, is messing up with your mind."

The next moment, his laughter echoed in her mind while his smiling face flashed in front of her eyes.

She forcefully closed her eyes, her grip tightening over the wood, to shut him. Neither she wished to rehear his joke nor remember things he did last night.

But it's not just about his kindness, a voice whispered.

Her eyes opened on their own. She felt warm and weak, losing control over her yet again.

It was not just his smiley facade that brought tears to her eyes when Shivina called Shubham to perform Kanyadan. It was not merely empathy that made her stay back for the dinner — first lying to him about the feast at Maitri's house, then to her mother about not getting taxi due to Diwali and stuffing food again to avoid unnecessary speculations. If it was merely his kindness she would never waited for him in the mornings secretly hoping to run into him, or fought with him to keep him away.

He affected her in a way nobody did.

There is something in him that I'm drawn to.

Her mind wandered.

Something beyond those shining blue green eyes or that contagious toothy smile. Something I can't see or understand yet feel so intense that it makes me out of control. Be it my reckless behavior around him or the way I act on impulse whenever I see him hurt or alone, she paused, lost in his thoughts.

'You have began to like him, don't you?'

And you should have denied all her theories & assumptions. Instead you sat there tongue-tied, listening, agreeing to her.

She clenched the sheet cover in her fist.

But what if she spoke the truth? What if—

"Priya!!" She got up angrily. "You're going insane. And it's—" she glared at the medicines again— "It's because of them."
 
"Life has never been kind to you. Most of the men in your life have been trash. In consequence you are misinterpreting Mr. Kapoor's kindness. It's not what you're thinking. Aisa kuch nahi hain," she scolded herself.

She inhaled deeply to calm her nerves.

"You were unwell, Priya. You need rest." She hopped on her side of the bed and pulled the duvet. "Just sleep and you will be fine by morning."

She shut her eyes, hoping to forget and erase whatever happened tonight, a night before, and perhaps all other nights she had spent thinking about him.