South Park Oneshots

🌹TimJim🌹

Timmy X Jimmy
An Accidental Act.
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It was a hot, spring day in South Park. Nothing out of the usual. Or, well there was one thing. Jimmy's 10th performance! Jimmy had been telling jokes at Skeeter's Bar for almost all his life. With school, he didn't have enough time to perform. People loved his jokes though. They all begged for more! And so, Jimmy had prepared an awesome performance for them. Finally, he could showcase his work once again.

Let's rewind a few days back.

After a long day at school, Timmy and Jimmy were walking home together. Timmy agreed on being his audience as he practiced.
"T-thanks Tim-Tim. I knew I could always re- I knew I could always rely- r- r- r-...count on you!" He stuttered, spewing out his words happily. "Timmy." Timmy replied, shrugging his shoulders. "Tim- timmy, timmah tim!" Timmy said happily.  "Oh B-boy Tim, sure hope you like I- i- it." Jimmy smiled, as they shared a look of glee.

Jimmy swang open his front door, letting Timmy go through. "H-hey ma! Ti- Tim- Timmy's staying over fo- for a little bit." Jimmy's mom nodded, and Jimmy helped Timmy down the stairs, to the basement. Jimmy had set up his own podium, with a mic and everything. Timmy was sitting infront of him, grinning. "Timmay, Tim!" He said, motioning for him to go ahead. Jimmy nodded, and grabbed the microphone, and his notebook of jokes. He started his rehearsal.

"H-hello skeeters! Glad to be ba- b- back....What a terrific audience.  So, a Man from Germany, a man from Netherlands, and a man from Belgium walk into a bar. They all speak to the same bartender. Th- thee.. the- they all seem to speak the same language, but they don't. D-do y-y-you get me? A-are you understanding this?.....ah forget it, t-T-tha- th- that-   .........I messed up on th- that one. Let me find a-another one..." Jimmy stated. Timmy looked at him, patiently.

   "Wo-w. What a T-terrific a-audience.

So, what's the problem wi- with all these wom- wo- wome- women, huh? I mean, c-come on! T-they have to- to fight for there right-rights as men si- sit around in luxu- luxury with full rights! Th- that's not Oka- that's not okaaay.. that's not ok- That is not good."

Timmy looked at him giggling. "T-immay!" Jimmy faced downwards, kinda upset. "I ca- can't seem to f-fi-f-find good jokes for the performance. Wh- wha-w-whaa- What am I gonna do, T-tim Tim?" Jimmy looked a bit stressed. His performance was next week and he didn't even have his jokes ready. Timmy saw this, and went over to the small podium, grabbing the notebook. He flipped the pages, and pointed a few jokes out to Jimmy. "Jim- Jimmy!" Jimmy looked up at him, then the notebook. "T-tim- timmy? Wh- wha- wha- Are you S- su- sure?" Timmy nodded, smiling with his teeth happily.

"A-alright here we g-go.
S-ss-so, I saw this guy drop a B-B-bunch of scra-scrabble letters on th- the- the sidewalk.     So, I said; 
'W-what's the w-wo- word on the street?' "

Jimmy grinned innocently, as Timmy snickered. "Tim- Jimmy!" Timmy smiled, at Jim's corny joke.

"H-ho-ho- h- how about this?;

Rest in P-P-P- Peace, boiling w-wa- water.     You w-will be mist."

Jimmy looked at his book, then back up to his strawberry-blonde bestfriend.
Timmy smiled, and chuckled, a sparkle of laughter in his eyes.
"W-w-what a terrific au-audience. What a- a Fanta- fantastic audience!"
Jimmy looked around the room, then spoke again, another joke to add to the bunch.

This went on for a few days, and Jimmy had finally put together his act. Timmy didn't really mind helping him. It's what best friends do, I guess.

.......................................

It was finally the day of his performance. Jimmy sat backstage, tightening his suit & tie. He looked at himself in the mirror, and smiled, pointing at his reflection with finger-guns.

"Jimmy Valmer, Your performance is in 10!" Jimmy heard the voice, and he smiled at himself. His hair was slicked back professionally, and a rose was held in the pocket of his suit.

5 minutes had past, and he flipped through the pages of his notebook, remembering the corny jokes. No matter how corny his words were, everyone found it funny. He ate a breathmint as he heard the director call  out to him. "1 minute, Valmer!"
Jimmy grabbed his crutches, and stood up. He got past the curtains, onto the stage. Cheers erupted through the place. All his friends had shown up, or well, everyone at school! He grinned, grabbing the mic and smiling at the crowd.

"H-h-hello, Skeeters! My n-na-name is Jimmy v-Valmer. I-I'm glad to be here a-a-aa-....again!" The crowd cheered as he grinned, waving at the crowd.

"S-S-so, a chick walks into a bar. They ask the bartender for a beer.

The bartender tells him;
So- s- ss- sor- sorry, we don't serve b- ba- bayh- babies."
Jimmy says, smiling innocently. The audience bursts out in laughter, at his stupid ass joke. This went on for quite a bit, with him spouting jokes out, corny dad-jokes like 'What's a spaghetti that isn't what it seems? An impasta!'

Jimmy seemed oddly happy. Everyone in the crowd loved his jokes, and his lovely grin kept growing. But, one joke could change the whole performance. One slip up could change his life.

And that happened.

"W-what is big, long, and has c-creaa-Cree- cre- c-....filling in the middle?

A Twinkie, you filthy minded bastard."

The audience was dying of laughter, as they giggled, Jimmy said something that came up in his mind... a little too loud..

"almost as big as my love for timmy...."
(I DIDNT KNOW WHAT TO PUT 😿)

The crowd gasped as Jimmy looked up. The audiences jaw dropped, and in the back, Timmy was totally flustered, looking around the room. "ti- ti- timmay..?"

"UHHH I'LL B-bb- BE RIGHT BACK FO- F- FOLKS!!"

Jimmy quickly left the stage and went to the back room. His face was red as fuck, and he was panting like crazy. He couldn't believe what he just said aloud.
"wh-wha-wht- why would I S-say that? Oh go- oh god, oh fu-fuc-fuck my life."

Jimmy sat down on the couch and exhaled heavily, tears rolling from his eyes. He put his head in his hands as he tried wiping his tears. "fuck, f-fffa- ffah- fuck!"

The door creaked open, and Jimmy didn't notice it. A faint rolling sound coming closer.

"Tim- Jimmy?" Timmy said, quietly. Jimmy's eyes darted up towards him.

"T-Timmy! I u- uh I can e- exx- exp- explain!" Jimmy looked at him, sweating.
"Timmy? Ti- timmah." Timmy put a hand on Jimmy's shoulder, smiling.

"Timmy? W-what do you m-mmee- mean?" Jimmy asked, sniffling.

"Jimmay." Timmy wrapped his arms around Jimmy, blushing like crazy. He chuckled while grasping him lightly. "Y-you- you mean I-it, Tim Tim?" Jimmy smiled a bit, still red as hell. He kept crying though, as he hugged Timmy back.  "Oh, timmah." Timmy nodded, cuddling him tighter. Jimmy's tears stopped as he froze. He then had a smile so wide and wholesome. He tightly squeezed Jimmy, obviously happy. "I-I- i love you, Timmy!"

"timmay."

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The end! I absolutely love this ship, and I hope the oneshot was good. I couldn't make up any jokes tho, so I made corny jokes of no understanding.
I really hope you like it!

Requested by: @BB_Tails101