Amygdala

Chapter 1: White Noise

(Note: Amygdala is the part of the brain that stores trauma)

...

It's been 3 weeks since he came back to Suppalo after the incident and him getting expelled for some time. Everyone as well as Akk himself thought that everything would be okay after they came back. The curse was revealed after all right?

He honestly doesn't know when it started, if it was the first day the protests began, the first time Chadow started pressuring him more or after the curse was revealed but lately everything seemed off. It started with small things, like waking up and feeling weird, the anxiety simmering for longer than usual, and not feeling as chatty. Then all of a sudden here he is, 3 weeks since Suppalo was exposed, since HE was exposed. And everything is just so.. wrong?

Every time he wakes up, he wakes up nauseous and with this light lingering anxiety that hasn't left for a week now, nothing feels particularly fun anymore, the smallest things overwhelm him, but also nothing could make him feel anything. It was like all of him was turned up to 100 and turned down to 0 at the same time. It was extremely confusing. Akk isn't stupid he knows that what he experienced was a lot, especially for someone his age. But he has tried, he really has. He started by making himself do the things he loved, thinking if he made himself do it the passion he once had would spark again. It felt so weird because it wasn't that his interests were boring or just not as fun anymore, he couldn't feel ANYTHING. He sat there and played his favourite game on his phone that he would spend hours on with Kan and Wat but now?.. nothing. He couldn't feel a thing and it made him extremely confused.

The worst part about it was the tiredness. No matter how much he slept he was just getting tired more and more tired every morning. He has even started to have nightmares, nothing insane but he would always wake up because his heart was beating almost out of his chest. Aye of course took notice pretty quickly once that numbness started. He never said anything but Akk knew that he had taken notice. It was impossible to miss the lingering stares as Akk lay on his desk to nap, how Akk wasn't the first to get out of bed anymore, and how his smiles seems to never have existed in the first place.

Right now it's a cold summer morning with the rain pouring for hours straight. Akk is laying on his desk with Aye's old jacket (now his) on him while he's looking out the window at the rain and the people running around trying to not get too wet. He can see a few students trying to protect their hair with their bags, a few people running from the food stand and the prefects... doing their rounds. A few are trying to avoid the rain but he can see Kan and Wat that pays it no mind and walks like it's not even raining in the first place. He missed being prefect. Now don't get him wrong, he is definitely happy to leave his role and he agrees that it was for the best. But it was something about Akks daily routine of scoring top grades in his classes, doing his rounds with Kan and Wat. He misses the routine that it gave, but he supposes ignorance is bliss. He was only really happy because he thought he was doing the right thing and doing it well. But in reality, it was so much more complicated than that.

...

"AKK!!"

"huh?" Akk turns around as he hears Aye screaming so loud it sounds like someone is dying

" Why are you yelling?" says Akk softly with a gloomy tone.

"I have been calling your name for what feels like forever bigfoot... What were you thinking about?" asks Aye as he sits down beside Akk in their empty classroom

Akk knows he has been feeling bad for a while now but for some reason, he can never manage to get bored of Aye. Aye is like the most interesting book you could ever find and you're so interested in every single word being said, excited to read the next page. Yet not even Aye can make him feel "whole".