𝐒𝐄𝐄 𝐘𝐎𝐔 𝐀𝐆𝐀𝐈𝐍, e.l.

𝐟𝐨𝐮𝐫. the suspect list

CHAPTER FOUR
"am i gonna die a virgin?"

    "OKAY, NERDS, LISTEN UP!" The group of friends sat on a few benches, all staring at Mindy, who stood in front of them. Ethan sat on the edge of one of the benches, Liesel's legs thrown over his as she sat beside Tara. "As terrifying as this all is, I'm actually glad I get a chance to redeem myself for not calling the killers last time." Liesel chuckled as she shook her head, letting the girl in front of her continue. Without anyone taking notice, Quinn and Ethan made quick eye contact. The Bailey girl gave him a stern look, as if she were telling him not to fuck anything up for them, to which he just dropped his head, looking away. "The way I see it, someone is out to make a sequel to the requel."

    "Uhm, whats a requel?"

    "You're beautiful, sweetie. Let's hold questions to the end." Liesel grinned, sitting up and removing her legs from her boyfriends lap before beginning to speak.

    "Stab 1 took place in Woodsboro, and Stab 2 took place in college. Our first movie took place in Woodsboro, and guess what? We're in college." Tara looked at the Conner girl, asking if the killer is trying to copy the movies, Mindy telling her it was a possibility.

    "Heroes now in college, check. Suspicious new characters brought in to round out the suspect list and or body count. Check, check, and check." Ethan leaned over towards Liesel, telling her he didn't like this. She grinned, patting his knee in attempt to make him feel better. "But it can't just be about Stab 2." Tara looked up at the girl, asking her why not. "It would make sense, if there were just a sequel. But we're not in a sequel, because nobody just makes sequels anymore. We're in a franchise! And there are certain rules to a continuing franchise." Liesel looked towards her friends, a grin on her face as she looked back up at the Meeks girl. "Rule one, everything is bigger than last time. Bigger budget, bigger cast, bigger body count. Longer chases, shoot outs, beheadings. You got to top what came before to keep people coming back."

"Beheadings?" Chad and Liesel looked at each other, questioning the girl as she kept on talking.

"Rule two, whatever happened last time, expect the opposite. Franchises only survive by subverting expectations. If the killers last time were whiny snowflake film nerds with Letterboxd accounts instead of personalities." Out of the corner of her eye, Liesel caught Ethan drop his head, looking down at his feet. Her brows furrowed in confusion before shrugging it off and letting Mindy continue. "You can bet the opposite will be true here. And rule three, no one is safe. Legacy characters? Cannon fodder at this point. Usually brought back only to be killed off in some cheap bid for nostalgia."

"So what I'm hearing is, I barely survived the first time just to be here and probably be killed this time? What a load of shit." Ethan looked up from his shoes, placing his hand on his girlfriends knee, like he was reminding her of what he told her last night.

    "No, Liesel. Don't worry your pretty little head. It's not looking too good for Gale and Kirby. Oh, and that's not even the worst part." Chad leaned over to Tara, telling her that this is where Mindy tells them what the worse part is. "The worst part is that the franchises are just continuing episodic installments designed to boost an IP. This means that main characters are completely expendable now too."

    "Mindy, you just told me not to worry. Now, you're telling me I can die. Make up your mind."

    "Okay, well, I made a mistake. All of us could die at any point. It's happened before. Laurie Strode, Nancy Thompson, Ellen Ripley, Sally Hardesty, Jigsaw, Tony Stark, James Bond. I mean, even Luke Skywalker. All died so their franchises could live on. That means it's not just the friend group." Ethan looked towards his girlfriend and then towards Mindy, asking her a few questions.

    "Wait, any of us?" Mindy nodded her head as Ethan asked another one. "Am I in the friend group?" The Conner girl chuckled, placing her hand on top of his, as Mindy spoke.

    "You're dating Liesel, so yes, you're in the friend group." Ethan asked another one, asking if he was one of the targets now, to which Mindy hummed in response.

    "Am I gonna die a virgin?" The group turned to Liesel, who sat glaring at her boyfriend like he had just given up their biggest secret.

    "Private information, E. That did not need to be asked in front of everyone." Mindy and the group nodded in agreement as the brunette crossed her arms over her chest.

    "That was a weird overshare. But it brings us to our current suspects. Ethan. The shy dorky guy who no one suspects because he's so shy and dorky. Never trust a love interest." Ethan was quick to get defensive, removing his hand from Liesel's knee, asking why he was on the suspect list.

    "Because I'm randomly Chad's roommate and I'm dating a survivor?"

    "Roommate lotteries can be juked, and you could be dating Lies to get close to the rest of us." Liesel's head shot up after hearing the sentence that came out of Mindy's mouth, wondering why she would ever say that. "Sorry, Lies." Chad sat up, pulling himself away from his notes to scold his twin sister.

    "I'm sure Ethan's dating Lies because he likes her and not because she's a victim of the killings, Mindy." Ethan turned to his girlfriend, placing a hand on her back as he looked at Mindy.

    "When I met Liesel, I didn't even know she was apart of the killings til after we started dating."