porcelain

seven

evangeline assumed her days away from nate would be filled with peace. no more fighting, no more making up, no more crying, no more begging. however, she found herself in a spiral. all she could think about was him, it was obsessive, compulsive, and she couldn't stop. he was a parasite that had taken over her brain and turned her into a complete different person.

she didn't go to the carnival, she couldn't even think of seeing maddy with him. she'd never despised her so heavily before but she definitely did now.

the following monday at school was more than bizarre. the whole thing was all a blur to evangeline. all the cops and rumors made her stomach tie in knots.

she walked through the empty hall with anxiety coursing through her whole body. she let out a yelp as she felt a firm hand pull her wrist into a dark and empty classroom. "shhh" she heard him coo at her. she softly gulped and looked up at the familiar face.

"nate what's going on?" her voice shook as she whispered, "what did you do?" he shook his head and kissed his teeth. nate knew she'd believe anything he said, she worshipped his every word without even thinking it over twice. she was so sweet and so gullible. "i didn't do shit." he grumbled, "just listen okay, i didnt mean what i said the other day, i'm really sorry." he wasn't completely lying, he only fabricated the truth a little. he didn't really mean it the way he said it anyway, he didn't want to scream at her the way he did, make her feel so woeful, to devastate her the way other men would, but he had to. she stepped out of line and he knew he needed to snap her back into their reality.

evangeline nodded slowly. part of her wanted to push him and leave all over again, but the bigger part of her wanted to hug him and feel the safety of his warmth. she always thought with her heart rather than her brain. "im sorry too" she murmured, "for walking out. and telling cassie." her voice trailed off in shame. she couldn't believe how stupid she was, how she barely thought things through, the consequences of her actions, her naivety. she was seventeen but her brain felt ten years younger, like she never fully matured to adulthood.

nate pulled her small frame into his chest, she felt his heart beat fast and only then she realized the hold she had over him. she could do anything and he'd forgive her, he craved her the way she did him and it made her smile. she knew it was evil to think about and it was something she shouldn't be happy about, even then she couldn't help it. it took maddy months to get his attention, but it took no effort from evangeline, he fell into her hands. it was crass for evangeline to hate her so much, after all, he was maddy's first and that made her feel penitent. yet, she felt the intoxication of power for the first time in her whole life.

he lifted her head with the tip of his finger, "you're still my girl, right?" his voice lingering with desire. "i always will be." her small voice purred as she looked him in his eyes. she let her arms roam from around his waist to his neck, wrapping them around and making his head level with hers, his ears hot as he feverishly met her lips to his.

nate was temporarily expelled from school for his alleged charges. it killed evangeline to not see him in the halls and to have to wait until after school to see him. it wasn't like they spoke or hung out at school, they couldn't with maddy always watching, but they casually exchanged glances during passing, knowing they shared the same secret. there was no doubt to her that he was innocent however, even maddy herself made a big deal about how it wasn't him.

nate's guilt over the incident hung over his head like a bad omen. he knew what he'd done wasn't excusable, no matter how much he thought she deserved it, he was torn between being the person he wanted to be and the person he knew he was. he knew he was cruel, his temper short and his thoughts of only violence. that was only how his brain was wired, what his father taught him to be. evangeline raced through his brain daily, her complete juxtaposition to him, she was his walking paradox. she was angelic, she was tender, she was a cherub made of glass. there were parts of him that wanted to shatter that glass, parts of him that wanted to see how far he could go with her until she crumbled.

the way she smiled. tucked her hair behind her ear. her collarbones that smelled of a sweet lingering perfume. how she crossed her legs in the air when she laid down on her stomach. the things he could think of for centuries, things he couldn't understand, things he never noticed about her for so many years. how could she? how dare she? she dangled in front of him like a forbidden fruit.