𝒱𝒶𝓇𝒾𝑒𝑔𝒶𝓉𝑒𝒹 𝒮𝓊𝓅𝑒𝓇𝓃𝑜𝓋𝒶 - 𝒢𝒽𝑜𝓈𝓉~𝒮𝓅𝒾𝒹𝑒𝓇

〖XVI〗

︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵︵‿

I was outside only instants ago, but I felt as scalding as if I never left my apartment. Warmer, maybe. I comprehend for some people a small peck on the lips means nothing, but those are people who aren't frightened to make a move. Of course, my situation was foreign, this is the hero of New York. Regardless, this was the first time in a while that I had such a challenging time refraining from blushing as if this was a high school crush. Except I am a legal adult, not a junior who just had their first kiss. I continued to hold cover of my cheeks with my hands as if somebody else was in close proximity to me. There was not.

"Your cheeks are as red as your lipstick whenever you share an intimate reaction with someone, you're a child." Arianna once said to me while we were still in a relationship, and now I reiterate it to myself in the mirror. She laughed when she said that, she would say it was adorable of me. I turned the cold knob on my sink, sharp. Letting my face absorb the water, waking myself up. I'd been asleep for a few years now, I needed to wake up. Ghost could be the difference that I require to wake up, and rise from the cursed slumber. Optimism was not something I embodied often. I blamed the kiss for that, she granted me some of her optimism. As they say, smiles are contagious.

I made the decision to not stop in for my morning coffee on my way to classes, Ghost was the coffee I ought to get through my day successfully. Now that I reminisce on this moment, writing it now, this was a burst of serotonin that I required. Coffee had become that substitute before, Ghost is the serotonin. The crisp air no longer affected me, it helped me thrive. Breathe in, breathe out. New York looked different. I detected the cafés along the street and the reinvigorated sidewalks, I was awakened. I took one last breath of the air that scratched my throat and strutted into my lecture hall.

 
Unlocking my laptop for note-taking was furthermore a new experience, I felt motivated. The keys were recognized as new and brisk, my screen was brighter. The dullness had disintegrated. While I pressed these keys I learned something new.

I had been productive today, considering the party was in a few weeks or so. I took a shower, fluffed up my hair, got dressed, ate dinner, and began my new book analysis assessment that was anticipated next class. That was before I was troubled by an acquainted knock at my window, it had pierced dusk already and I had a visitor. I walked over the window and lifted it just enough for Ghost to fit through, and the aroma of alcohol. It was faint but adequate enough that I could differentiate the alcohol type. Vodka.

"Are you drunk?" I already perceived the answer, asking as more of a courtesy than enlightening.

"Maybe, I'm not really sureeeeee. I've never, drank, before." She leaned against the back of my couch, her hands gripping the frame exceptionally hard.

"How many drinks have you consumed?" I latched the window, made my way over to the kitchen, and poured some water into a cup. I handed the exact cup over to Ghost, who was concentrating on the wall.

"I have noooo idea." She emphasized the no, extending the o sound for a few more seconds. She raised the cup from my hands, shifting her emphasis to the water in the cup. She seemed disappointed when she took a sip and uncovered it wasn't Vodka.

"Did you know that alcohol tastes reallllly bad? I have no idea how people drink soooo much of this stuff." She placed the cup of water on a side table. Ghost was definitely a talkative drunk, the filter between her brain and her mouth seemed to have dissolved with the alcohol. Despite this she looked composed and clean, it was only her thoughts that weren't. I grabbed the half-empty glass and poured more water into it. It wasn't prolonged before I realized that Ghost was standing behind me.

"You should lay down on the couch, you need to snooze off the alcohol." I set the cup in her hand, but she wouldn't abide it. I instead placed it on the counter behind me to my left.

"Wow, you look really pretty." She blurted out, looking me up and down. I'm sure she's just drunk, nothing more, nothing less.

"Thank you, but you need to rest Ghost. I'm already conditioning myself to deal with your hangover." I gripped the counter behind me, my eyes not leaving the drunken Ghost.

"Can I kiss you?" She asked, pulling up her mask beyond her lips. Deja vu from the morning, this was different though. She just went for it, full on.

"No, you cannot. You don't want to do this." I blocked her, shifting my face away from hers. Arguing with my own temptations. This was not consensual, Ghost was influenced by alcohol. If she kissed me, that would be the end of it. I understood this was not a move she should make, considering so many factors.

"Yes I do, come on it's just a little kiss." She tried again. I boosted myself onto the counter as a last alternative, my legs dangling down from the countertop. My struggle to evade Ghost's lips again.

"No, you don't. You're drunk, Ghost."

For the third time she tested, gripping my thigh as leverage to reach my lips. As much as I focused on her touch, I had to refrain from myself. I continued drawing away and bending back, avoiding Ghost lips again.

"Ghost you don't want this, you're drunk. You'll regret it. You don't want this." The truth I fed to Ghost and the lies I kept foraging for myself, dropping off the counter and sliding Ghost's mask back over their lower face. I forcefully tugged and dragged Ghost to my couch, sitting them down and hoping they would pass out. I brought over an assortment of pillows and blankets, placing them near Ghost.

"Take a nap." I stitched my serious face back into my skin, and she listened this time. Using her body weight, she lay on her side and slept. Or at least I thought, it was hard to tell with the mask.