My Sucky, Wonderful Life

Revealing The Truth

Claire’s POV

Yes, playing with a smashed hand isn’t very easy but just the music makes me feel better so I just dealt with it and played my heart out.

I played multiple songs varying from soul, rock, and country. My favorite song out of the them all was one that I learned when I was little. My father was a great guitar player and taught me how to play it. “Faith” By Jordin Sparks.

I played through it multiple times, as it always seemed to lift my mood.

Hey there sad eyes

What’s on your mind

Don’t look so down

Give it some time

You don’t have to be

So hard on your self

I know the world can be a brutal place

But please don’t let it steal your smile away

‘Cause when the sky is darkest

You can see the stars

And when you fall the hardest

You’ll see how strong you are

Close your eyes

Rest awhile

It’s been a long, long day

Come on baby, baby

Have a little faith…

As you can see, it definitely is what I need to hear at the moment.  

For hours I just sat by the pond and played my guitar. It cheered my  mood up so much that I wasn’t even paying attention to what was going on around me. I was too absorbed.

When I did  hear some rustling leaves and twigs, I just assumed that it was a little rabbit or something.

I played through the whole song, singing along the words with all my heart.

When I had finished, I heard clapping.

Startled, I fell into the pond, guitar and all.

“Oh my god! Are you ok?” I familiar voice called. Trying to help me out of the water.

I flinched as he took my hand and pulled me up.

Sometimes I seriously think something it wrong with me. I mean, there I was, playing the guitar and didn’t even feel a pinch of pain. But then when some person helps me out of the water, I get a whole painful wave of it.

I opened my eyes to thank my savior.

Kurt was there in his shining glory, waaayyyy too close for comfort.

I shrieked and fell into the pond again, but this time I brought him in along with me instead of the guitar.

The guitar!

I quickly stood up and rushed over to the guitar, taking it in my hands. I was soaked through, not playable anymore. My only and favorite guitar was ruined. Not only was it my favorite, but… it was also my fathers. I was one of this few things that survived the earthquake.

I felt salty tears join the pond water on my face as I held the guitar close. I sensed him sit down next to me and hesitantly put his arm around my shoulders.

I was too depressed to even flinch away from his touch and instead, laid into it, unconsciously searching for warm and comfort.

We sat there for a while, not saying anything. But soon it started to get dark and Kurt slowly helped me back onto my feet and started leading me away from the pond.

“Are you ok now?” He asked quietly as we walked down a path, leading out of the wooded area.

I nodded.

“Do you mind telling me what all of that was about? You don’t have to if it’s too painful to talk about but it seemed that you were crying for more then one reason. And some pretty painful reasons at that.

He was right. At that time I wasn’t just crying for my dad. I was crying for my family, the kids, my friends, and all this crap that my life has turned out to be.

Before that earthquake, I never would have imagined that it would turn out like this. I thought that my life would be enjoyable and fun, never having to worry about 12 kids at a time at the age of 17.

I’m sure that no normal person ever thought of that either. Never thought of loosing your parents in seconds and not being able to do anything about it. Watching as kids lots younger than you go through so much pain that you can barely deal with at your age, and not being about to do anything about it. Being so hopeless and not being able to help and save the ones that you care about.

Then having to hide yourself from the world so that no one else gets hurt. Having to keep your feelings inside until you feel like your about to burst, yet still not be able to talk about it with anyone. Having to stay strong for not only yourself, but also the ones around you.

It’s a lot to hold on your shoulders each and everyday. Definitely not something that any normal person would think about, because they would have no reason to.

And that’s exactly what I said. I actually said all of that to Kurt without even realizing what I had said until it was already out of my mouth. I told him everything. The earthquake, the beatings, the kids, the marks, everything that I never dared say to anyone. Yet, I was telling it all to someone I had only known for a short few days.

He sat there and listened the whole time. Not once removing his arm from my shoulder, or making even the slightest movement to symbolize he was uncomfortable. He listened until I was done and then didn’t press for anymore details when I was finished.

We sat there, huddled on a rock by the path, until the sun had started to set and the sky turned a deep violet.

We didn’t talk the whole way to his car. Not a word to the orphanage. I thought he wasn’t going to talk to me at all.

But I was wrong.

Right before I went through the door, he pulled me into a tight hug and said quietly “It’s going to be okay.” Then he left without saying a word more.

I had heard people say that so many times, I had even said it more times then I could count. But that was one of the few times that… I actually believed it.

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For those who know the song "Faith" or just listened to it. I know that the song is originally a piano but there is a guitar part that sounds more or less like the part but I couldn't a video of it on Youtube so I just put up the original song. So please don't post comments about crap like that.