from a young age I became a perfectionist
I was always the one who jumped, I never tripped nor fell
I never made a mistake, and if I did I hid it well
id get my act together so no body could tell
that I too was flawed.
this was a result of naturally always being the best
it consumed my childhood and I quickly became obsessed
I set unrealistic expectations that I forced myself to meet
because if I wasn't perfect then i was incomplete
I thrived in school, in sport, in all of it
nothing less than 100%, I made sure of it
I would hurt myself carrying the weight of perfection
but I was convinced that that would hurt much less than rejection
and of course that was too much pressure for a child to endure
the stress on my mind and heart grew more and more
it was so great it caused me to break right open
I felt free but i had to find a way to cope
in
this new body of mine that was battered and bruised beneath the skin
from the wounds caused by the monster that had been trapped within
it escaped its cage ready to shout and to cry
just wanting to release every emotion for all the years it had to hide
it was time to grow, to learn from my mistakes
to finally admit that it is okay
its okay to colour outside of the lines
and to not know the answer, I don't have to be right
its okay
it is okay
but that doesnt make it any less scary.
everything in my life has always been in the palm of my hand
I was the dictator and everything always went according to my plan
until one day, I fell.
I did not jump. I didnt intend for this to happen but it did. And I havent been able to get back up.
I was terrified, for the first time, I wasnt in control
but it wasn't a decision I could make its just what I felt in my heart and in my soul.
you make me feel safe, you accept me and my mistakes though I used to hide them well.
I did not jump into love with you, but I fell.
Youre here for the good and the bad. youll stick with me through it all,
And now I know its okay, I continue to fall.
every hour, minute, and every second.
every word you speak with care and discretion.
every smile and also every tear
every memory we've made and every moment we will share
every text message, and every single call, trip me,
Now, I continue to fall
forever deeper in love with you.
YOU ARE READING
Scribbles, Thoughts, and Doodles.
PoetryA collection of mostly poems and a few stories. I will be continuously adding to this as I experience life and need a creative outlet to express myself. I hope this reaches people who can relate, and if you can't, I hope you get to know me as you vi...
