I'm not sorry

Chapter 2

Harry bloody Potter, was an idiot. I had always known this since the first time I laid eyes on him I new he had to much of his father in him to not be an idiot but you can't blame a man for hoping. I sighed, again. I've been doing that an awful lot the last three days then again having an heart attack because one of your students decided to play hero, again, and having that student literally die in your arms really takes it out of you. I rubbed my face trying to clear my thoughts and failing miserably, leaning back in the visitors chair and watching Harry as he slept. I couldn't even find it in myself to be creeped out with the fact that I have been staring at a sleeping student for about half an hour.

Harry had died. The thought alone unnerved me, but those ten seconds of no reaction and a still heartbeat had broken something in me. No matter how much I wanted to push the feelings away to ignore the aching in my gut I couldn't. Harry was a light he was a sarcastic, passionate, headstrong, brat that insisted on figuring things out on their own without help. But he was still a light for many, good or bad didn't matter. And those ten seconds was all it took for me to realize just how much I would miss the brat if he were gone, his headstrong attitude, his witty remarks, his furious glair when he felt he had been wronged, his eyes. I sighed again.

He's going to be the death of me, I just know it. Not even acknowledging my own emotions towards the brats death I pushed aside it all and focused on the cold hard facts. Potter had died and revived. He is recovering much faster than anticipated. If the conversation I had with him an hour ago is anything to go by, seems to have taken the news well, if crying into your most despised teacher's chest is taking it well that is. My grone of frustration was animalistic. Why can't I keep my mind off it!

The way Harry had fell into my arms at the Womping willow. The way he had practically tackled me in a Bear hug before breaking down in my chest. The fact that I had, quite without realizing it, hugged him back giving advice and encouragement and heaven forbid a promise. Those emerald green eyes glowing with mirth as they asked a solid question with no room for loopholes, proving that the boy who lived has a brain! The cheek when stating that he heard the company was great. The audacity of this teen was amazing. And as I gazed at him while he slept I couldn't help thinking that he wasn't at all like his father and surprisingly not all that much like his mom either. He was his own brand of crazy stupid genius that only Harry bloody Potter could pull off.

I was honestly curious what Harry would ask with his remaining questions curious as well if the question was a one time stroke of genius or a raven hiding in a lion's den. Either way I wouldn't find out for a while seeing as Harry had only just fallen into a peaceful sleep. I rose stretching my limbs and brushing my hair out of my face before striding to poppy's office granting a series of three rough knocks before walking in. Poppy was awake, of course, and currently running diagnostic spells over a very scruffy looking serious black. Severus didn't spare the dog a glance confronting poppy directly "any changes" my tone was clipped and clinical as always. Poppy looked up from the scan's to glair at me disapprovingly "Severus he's sleeping please have a little more tact" I stared at her until she sighed "He's doing fine recovering well, the dmentors didn't have a chance to give him the kiss so he should recover soon, how's Harry you were in there for quite a while"

The look she gave me made me uncomfortable although I'm not particularly shur why "he awoke, about an hour ago" I was rather pleased with the way my voice stayed strong not wavering with the emotions I felt in myself. Poppy's movements screeched to a halt and she turned to me eyes alight with questions. I waited for the onslaught with resigned patients. "He's awake? Did he seem alright?" Was at the for front of her interrogation "he was awake he fell back asleep a short time ago, he seemed in pain but other than that their didn't seem to be anything the matter with him" she stared me down with a suspicious look "and what exactly were you doing for the rest of the time. I assume it didn't take an hour just to find out if Harry was suffering from pain" she questioned.