Linked Souls

5) Awakening from oblivion

I felt from the beginning that the moment of our separation would come, but I belied my pessimistic view, because I wished to be wrong about her, and that she wouldn't leave me to the darkness of the nights alone again, but she did. She just did.

My love for her was a fire, but she wanted to be rain.
My love for her was the sun, but she hated to see the day.
My love for her was a river, but she wanted to be a dam.

She no longer sat next to me and went too far in parting.
But my backpack was next to me.
My backpack hasn't changed on me, it didn't represent me with love, it never refused to sit by my side, That's why my backpack is better than humans.

Whenever I see her far away from me, a sharp knife cuts my soul, but, as the philosopher Jagger once said, "You can't always get what you want", even though I loved her more than anything, that doesn't mean she will be mine .. and that's fine.

I lied, it's not fine.
But I have to move on as she moved on, it's not fair to live in the hell of her separation while she lives in the paradise of my neglect.
I used to vent my anger into satirical writing, sketches of grief and, of course, playing games.

I wasn't letting myself to my mind, Because I believe that the tragedy of the human is his mind, likewise, all my thoughts were negative, most of my thoughts were how to make her feel the humiliation and sorrow she made me feel, how do I make her taste from the same cup from which she made me taste.

But I would come to my senses afterwards, No, John, we never hurt the ones we loved in the past, even if they didn't love us back, we have standards.

I had no hatred for Adrian, he wasn't obnoxious.
he hasn't been my friend for six years, He didn't pretend to be friendly and didn't wear a mask.  He just found a girl whose beauty was irresistible and wanted to get closer to her.
I don't blame him.  But all the blame was on her, She is the one who put me in the pit of love and then left me in the depth of sorrows.
_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-

The days passed, and only God knows how they passed.

We graduated from school and went to university, we were separated by another separation, and the distances between us increased.

I entered the College of Engineering, hoping to build Tranquility houses that were not built inside me, but for Leia, I didn't know which colleges she went to, she blocked me from social media as she blocked me from her eyes and heart, all communication between us was cut off.

My roommate at the university was named Idris, He was super smart, nerdy vibes and all, with his glasses and always untidy hair, Adam's apple and shy posture, only talks about science and scientists.. that's why I was his only friend ... outcasts for outcasts, you know. he was a good fellow.

and while I was in one of the lectures, someone came up to me and whispered "Hey, you know that Animals that lay eggs don’t have belly buttons"

"Who tf starts a conversation like that !" I replied trying to process what he just said.

"Just think about it"

"Yeah, it's logical not gonna lie but can you just shut up" I asked politely.

He extended his hand smilingly, “Colleague, my name is Mark, why are you getting on your nerves like this, relax.”

I reached out and said hello to him, "My name is John, I just tend to focus, mate."

Mark was weird, But he was kind-hearted, even though he was a distraction and wouldn't concentrate in any class unless the teacher was a beautiful woman.
However, he was also a good fellow.

The three of us used to meet in our room and discuss different topics. I fell in love with our conversations together. It was the first time I had friendship and conversations like this.

"No, no, nooo, Romeo and Juliet are the most toxic couple ever, they applied the saying "And of love is what kills." "Said Idris

Mark replied "Mine is Belle falling for the beast, that's really weird, How did she leave Gaston, this handsome guy that all the girls love, and fall in love with a furry monster with horns in his foolish head that locks her in a ghosted mansion? Believe you me, I'm not a monster but no girl ever fell in my love because I'm a kind-hearted person lol".

Idris said "Oh really? So what about Elena and damon huh, she was under the influence of the sire bond, she had no choice. This couple was as toxic in the show as they were loving in the original fairy tale and the most toxic thing is ........"

Mark intrupted "Wait wait, you watch that stuff?"

"Not really but my cousin was gossiping about him all the time" said Idris

Mike "okaaay, so hear me out, Peter Parker and MJ, I mean she only loved him when she knew he was Spider-Man duh, she only wanted to be with a person of obscene wealth or obscene power and fame."

Suddenly silence prevailed and their eyes turned towards me

"What about you, Mr.Pantomime ?" Mark said sarcastically.

"I don't know, I don't see a lot of movies like you guys, I only read books and novels.... "

" Booooring!!! " Mark yelled.

"Ok, mine is John and Leia, where John fall in love with her, and she never thinks about him, isn't that kinda toxic?"

"Yo, chill dude I'm sorry but tell us more that sounds fun" said Mark.

The night ended after I told them what happened between us, in the midst of Idris's attempts to help me with my anxiety and Mark's sarcasm, which despite my sadness made me laugh at his creativity in irony, and I always felt that behind his continuous sarcasm there was an inner pain, as it was happening to me.

And before we fell asleep, Idris got up from his bed and said, "Guys, I have an idea that you might like."...