College Life | Hailee Steinfeld

Chapter 30: Walk Away

Y/N's POV:

I immediately jump up from my spot, trying to distance myself from Hero and Hailee steps into the backyard and closes the door behind her; not wanting to make a scene.

I move away from the couch and from Hero, trying to get in front of Hailee but Hero steps up and speaks, "Listen Hailee it's not what you think. Y/N was super overwhelmed inside, the music, the noise, the alcohol and she was dealing with her overstimulation alone might I add. I saw her, asked her if she needed fresh air and I was only comforting her. She really needed someone. I'm sure it seemed intimate from where you're standing, but it was merely a concerned person looking out for someone in need" he speaks up, defending himself and me. Damn he's a good actor, I almost believed him too but he tried to kiss me and I'm pretty sure that isn't in the description of what to do when someone is overwhelmed.

"Do you think I'm fucking dumb? I saw you try to kiss her" Hailee spits back at him, stepping closer to his face, her fists clenched beside her.

"Actually, I do think you're fucking dumb. Leaving your girlfriend alone at a party when she's new to this life? Don't try and act like you care for her now. She was alone and it was me who was here for her, not you" He responds, his voice becoming angrier and louder.

"I can speak for myself Hero, thank you though" I say as I pull his arm, so he's stepped away from Hailee.

I'm not in front of her, her eyes full of anger, her body tense like she's ready to pounce. "Hero was here for me, and you weren't. Where were you all night? You can't come out here and be upset that I'm in the company of someone other than you or Flo, you've been in the company of everyone else but me Hailee. Don't come out here and try to act like you care, after it was your actions that led me out here" I say to her, sternly but not in a loud tone. Still aware we're at a public party and not in the comfort of our home.

"You're right, Hero did try to kiss me. I stopped him. He stopped and respected it, but can you blame him? If I was him I would've thought I was single too. You haven't been with me for more than a minute since we stepped in this door" I speak up again, this time choking up a bit on my words.

I feel a hand on my back, comforting me. It's Hero's.

"Don't fucking touch her" Hailee angrily says to her, stepping past me and shoving his hand off of my back.

"First you leave her alone at a big party, ignore her, yell at her and then you make her cry? You deserve a girlfriend of a year award Hailee Steinfeld" Hero laughs at her, their shoulders colliding as he walks past her back inside leaving just me and Hailee in the back to discuss this mess.

I give him a soft smile as he turns back to me before shutting the door.

"Listen, Hailee. I came here to this party for you. You know this isn't what I'm used to. I gave you freedom tonight, but I didn't think you would take it so willingly. I have no idea what you've been doing or who you've been with. I didn't want to be that clingy girlfriend and stick by your side like a lost puppy all night, but I was also under the impression that you were the type of girlfriend to make sure I'm okay, to check in with me, want to be in my presence and for the love of God at least introduce me to your friends and make me feel comfortable. You really surprised me tonight, maybe I don't know who you truly are as a girlfriend. Maybe I don't know you" I speak up to her, her eyes now soft as they stare into mine.

I don't give her a chance to speak, I walk past her and into the loud house. I really am so disappointed in Hailee. I hate the way I feel right now, I hate that it's her making me feel this way.

Consumed by sadness, disbelief, and a little bit of anger the party is now a blur. The music seems faded to me, the lights dimmer, and the people in slow motion. I find Flo and let her know I'm leaving, and she follows me out.

"Hey, slow down love. Are you okay?" Flo grabs my hand to stop me from walking in the direction of our hotel.

"Long story. It's Hailee. I just really need to get out of here, you don't need to come you can stay and enjoy yourself" I say as I give her a smile trying to hide my sadness.

"What? Fuck that. It's just a party. I'm not letting you leave alone, especially like this" Flo says, as she interlocks our arms and we both walk in silence to the hotel.

Why is everyone but my own girlfriend saying the right things?

Flo breaks the silence, "Sooo, you were only gone from me for like 15 minutes, what happened?"

I take a deep sigh, thinking about it makes me feel guilt even though I didn't do anything. "Honestly, it was a big misunderstanding but then it turned into something bigger". I say, and Flo just gives me a "continue" look, so I do.

"Well, Hero, you know him right? He says you guys are buddies. He and I met in the kitchen when I was taking a moment to myself, I honestly was feeling overwhelmed and out of place the moment I stepped in here but Hailee left me so I didn't know what to do and you looked like you were enjoying yourself so I didn't want to make you feel obligated to leave. Anyways, we introduced ourselves and he noticed I was uncomfortable and uneasy in the house, he suggested we go outside and get air. I listened to him, followed him and we talked. He was under the impression I was alone, since I technically was alone most of the night, not from you but from Hailee. I told him about me following Hailee here, and she's my girlfriend but he made a point saying she was silly for leaving me alone when I'm feeling his way, or really in general. I agreed with him. Long story short he tried to kiss me, I moved away, and he didn't push it or anything but Hailee finally decided to check on me and walked out when he was super close to my face looking like I was up to no good. Hailee yelled, Hero yelled, I yelled and then I left Hailee back there. Honestly Flo, I am angry Hailee acted like I wasn't her girlfriend tonight. She wasn't near me at all, she wasn't concerned or worried about my whereabouts or actions until I was caught conversating with a good-looking guy, outside, alone. So that's that". I say, still looking at my feet as we walk towards our hotel.

"Oh darling, I'm sorry. I see how you feel but I also don't blame Hailee for assuming something was going on. I mean come on, you and Hero alone, he's close to you? That guy is a charmer, and everyone knows it. I know you though, and I know you aren't a cheater but I could only assume how bad it looked standing in Hailee's shoes. However, your feelings are so valid. She did leave you alone, she didn't introduce you, take care of you or entertain you during this whole party. Someone saw that and tried to help you, she can't be mad at someone trying to repair her damage. I'm sorry love" Flo says again, stopping to give me a hug. We stand like that for a little, my pain slowly easing away as I'm in Flo's embrace. For the first time tonight, I feel seen and cared for. Yet again, not by the one person I needed it most from; my girlfriend.

We reach our hotel and Flo has her own room and tells me to stay in it with her tonight and allow Hailee to have our room to herself considering things are shaky. If I'm being honest with you, I'm so upset Hailee didn't run after me and try and console me or at least plead her case. She really stayed to party, while I walked home with a pit in my stomach.

I wash up and get in bed with Flo who immediately turns to cuddle me.

Things between Hailee and I are going to get better right? We'll get through it, right?

-

short update! <3