ARYA

⁹ [ 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗲𝘃𝗶𝗹 𝗾𝘂𝗲𝗲𝗻 ]

I hate to admit that Madam might have been a little right, but...well... Madam might have been a little right. Though the majority of Africa was dubbing me a hero and obsessing over my victoriousness, there were unhappy leaders and individuals here and there who felt as though I had abused my power. Of course, some of them were nothing more than misogynistic men who couldn't stand to see my name associated with prolific male leaders of our past, but some were women and children who feared that they would be targeted in the future by rebel groups who feel the need to avenge Edward Taye, Pau Jagba, and two other men whose names I quite honestly forgot. Those other men, excluding Edward Taye, were a part of Taye's cabinet and were with him when he was captured. They too had been killed, but to my knowledge, their deaths were much simpler: shotgun to the head. I had been asked a few times if I would like to watch the video of Taye's torture, but I declined. Being pregnant and all, now is the last time that I would want to watch anything bloody or protruding. It'll just make me think about giving birth, which I'll be doing by early April. That means I have a little under six months to go. I honestly feel far behind.

Speaking of my pregnancy, it had been announced by Doe Castle's press early last week that I would be refraining from any public duties for a while. This is a royal protocol that dates back to the Victorian era if I am not mistaken. It is something that is done because pregnancy back then was seen as sacred and taboo. I was given the option of continuing to do small events and such throughout my pregnancy, but I realize that these six months may be one of the only times within my reign, whether long or short, that I will get to relax. Unfortunately, the timing of it all is kind of shitty. I mean think about it: Edward Taye is killed, and now I am suddenly stepping back from royal duty? Sounds suspect, right? Like maybe I could not handle the heat, whatever that may be in the eyes of civilian Africa. Not to mention my fear that my pregnancy bump will show through my coronation gown in November. By then I will only be a little less than four months along, so I have hope, but it's currently a toss-up. There has been discussion about a last-minute wardrobe change in case it is needed. If my bump is too far out, I will be handed a more freeing gown or my coronation jacket will be zipped up. It sucks, because I wanted to be able to announce my pregnancy to the world, but there are too many dramatic, current events going on for me to do so. My wedding, the death of Edward Taye, my coronation... my life will appear as a never-ending saga to commoners, and they may worry for their wellbeing. That is the absolute last thing I need.

I was in no way upset at life. In fact, I think I was living a life that deep down, I had always wanted. I am catered to, cared for, and married to the most amazing man. I am about to be somebody's mother and I have found mine. But something inside of me still had this tinge of emotion, negative emotion, that told me that I should be sad. I should be crying and snotty-nosed right now. How ungrateful of me, I am blessed yet longing for some sick kind of self-pity? I huffed, sitting up with my back against my headboard. I pulled my knees in and curled my recently painted white toes, as white was one of the only colors that I was allowed to paint my nails with. I used my toes to grip me and Tyler's satin black sheets. I was still dressed in my night attire: light blue "booty" shorts and a white short-sleeve crop top with a pocket on the left breast. I was trying to enjoy my pre-pregnancy physique for as long as I could before the bump came in if you couldn't tell.