Jane Doe

Change me

Laying in the hospital bed and looking at the white walls isn't very entertaing I've been here for 3 days and nothing seems to change around here. Getting up from the bed and walking to the only window that lights up the room, I look down watching the people rush off to places.

They have somewhere to go, memories to share and loved ones to think about them. I feel so alone so out of place. Putting my hand against the glass and feeling the slight coolness transfer to my hand tells me it's not a very warm day, yet people are still rushing off to different places.

Pulling my hand back I turn away, I hate this stupid place. Walking over the the mirror they gave me to try and jog my memories doesn't seem to do anything but make me question who I really was

I'm actually pretty short I notice, I'm not really skinny but not fat either. My eyes are an almond brown and my skin is tan. My hair and the piercings that are just holes because i removed the actual piercings. May the old me really liked them but now i think they're a little much. My hair is in the middle of my back, it's black with the tips electric blue. I tilt my head it makes me so angy to not be able to remember who i was what my life was like. The frustration just seems to grow with each passing day.

Looking at myself longer I just don't feel right. This doesn't feel like me, but I guess I can't really say anything because I don't know who me is. From the corner of my eye something flashes at me. Turning my head I find a pair of scissors sitting on the desk next to my mirror.

Looking at my reflection one more time I make a spilt decision and grab them. I clutch them tightly, an over whelming feeling of just needing change comes over me and at that moment I grab a chunk of my hair and chop it off.

The pieces drift to the floor as more and more fall. When I'm done there is a short jagged bob in its place. I squint my eyes at myself, well i now know i wasn't someone who was good at cutting hair. Shrugging my shoulders as sigh escapes my lips i look at the change. Once done I look back at my reflection, it's not that big of a change but it is different.

Putting the scissors down I run my hand through my hair feeling the difference. I guess this is a good thing. Walking over to my bed I only just sit down when I hear a knock at the door. Looking up I watch Mark my doctor walk in he's starring down at he clip board looking through the papers.

I honestly think that's all he does. "Good morning Jane how are you?" I cringe a little at the name he calls me. Jane doe is my place holder name until I can remember anything about myself, I really hate the name but i have no choice.

I shrug "I'm alright" he glances up at me, if he notices the Change he doesn't really acknowledge it. "I have some news for you" leaning against the the pillow on the bed I nod at him to continue. "We are starting you on therapy sessions tomorrow, we think this could unlock something." I glare at him, "Therapy really?!? I don't think that's going to accomplish anything.." Putting down his clip board he sighs he knows ive lost hope "Jane, we're just trying to help can you please just try?" I look away from him crossing my arms across my chest, I know it's childish but I really don't want to go to therapy.

"Please Jane just try it out" I sigh knowing even if I don't say yes I'm still going to have to go, he's only asking me so i feel like i have some choice . "I'll go but that doesn't mean I'll like it." He smile happy with me complying "alright I'll see you tomorrow" He waves and walks out of the room.

Slipping down on to the bed so that I'm laying looking at the white ceiling things just keep getting more and more interesting I guess. I want my memories back, i just feel so incomplete. If he thinks therapy will help them I guess that's what I'll have to try. I don't think it will help though, i face the wall and curl into myself i don't want to be here.