Series 3 Rewrite with a Baby

Chapter 5: Gridlocked

"Just one trip. That's what I said. One trip in the Tardis, and then home. Although I suppose we could stretch the definition. Take one trip into past, one trip into future. How do you fancy that?" The Doctor asked Martha
"No complaints from me."
"How about a different planet?"
"Can we go to yours?"
"Ah, there's plenty of other places."
"Come on, though. I mean, planet of the Time Lords. That's got to be worth a look. What's it like?"
"Well, it's beautiful, yeah." The Doctor grudgingly told her carefully omitting the fact that he destroyed it.
"Is it like, you know, outer space cities, all spires and stuff?"
"I suppose it is."
"Great big temples and cathedrals."
"Yeah."
"Lots of planets in the sky?"
"The sky's a burnt orange, with the Citadel enclosed in a mighty glass dome, shining under the twin suns. Beyond that, the mountains go on forever. Slopes of deep red grass, capped with snow."
"Can we go there?"
"Nah. Where's the fun for me? I don't want to go home. Instead, this is much better. Year five billion and fifty-three, planet New Earth. Second hope of mankind. Fifty thousand light years from your old world, and we're slap bang in the middle of New New York. Although, technically it's the fifteenth New York from the original, so it's New New New New New New New New New New New New New New York. One of the most dazzling cities ever built.
********************************************
The Tardis was blocking a narrow alleway. They walked out into rain.
"Oh, that's nice. Time Lord version of dazzling." Martha said really rather rudely
"Nah, bit of rain never hurt anyone. Come on, let's get under cover," the Doctor said carefully tucking Petra under his coat to stop her from getting wet.
"Well, it looks like the same old Earth to me, on a Wednesday afternoon."
"Hold on, hold on. Let's have a look."
The Doctor used his sonic screwdriver to get a monitor working.
"And the driving should be clear and easy, with fifteen extra lanes open for the New New Jersey expressway." A woman on a monitor said as a picture of a high-tec Manhattan and flying cars came onscreen.
"Oh, that's more like it. That's the view we had last time. This must be the lower levels, down in the base of the tower. Some sort of under-city."
"You've brought me to the slums?"
"Much more interesting. It's all cocktails and glitter up there. This is the real city."
"You'd enjoy anything."
"That's me. Ah, the rain's stopping. Better and better."
"When you say last time, was that you and Rose?"
"Er, yeah. Yeah, it was, yeah."
"You're taking me to the same planets that you took her?" (What's wrong with that, it means that it is a nice place so stop complaining)
"What's wrong with that?"
"Nothing. Just ever heard the word rebound?" (Martha you are incredibly insensitive)
A man opened the front of his stall.
"Oh, You should have said. How long you been there? Happy. You want Happy."
More hatches opened. The next two where women.
"Customers. Customers. We've got customers."
"We're in business. Mother, open up the Mellow, and the Read."
"Happy, Happy, lovely happy Happy!"
"Anger. Buy some Anger!" (Who would chose to be angry?)
"Get some Mellow. Makes you feel all bendy and soft all day long."
"Don't go to them. They'll rip you off. Do you want some happy?"
"No, thanks." The Doctor told them.
"Are they selling drugs?" (No Martha they are selling giant inflatable parsnips)
"I think they're selling moods."
"Same thing, isn't it?"
More people started to enter the area, listless and dressed in rags.
"Over here, sweetheart! That's it, come on, I'll get you first!"
"Oi! Oi, you! Over here! Over here! Buy some Happy!"
"Come over here, yeah. And what can I get you, my love?"
"I want to buy Forget."
"I've got Forget, my darling. What strength? How much do you want forgetting?"
"It's my mother and father. They went on the motorway."
"Oh, that's a swine. Try this. Forget Forty three. That's two credits."
"Sorry, but hold on a minute. What happened to your parents?" The Doctor queried,
"They drove off." She answered,
"Yeah, but they might drive back."
"Everyone goes to the motorway in the end. I've lost them."
"But they can't have gone far. You could find them. No. No, no, don't."
The woman stuck the Forget 43 tab to her neck.
"I'm sorry, what were you saying?"
"Your parents. Your mother and father. They're on the motorway."
"Are they? That's nice. I'm sorry, I won't keep you." The woman said before leaving,
"So that's the human race five billion years in the future. Off their heads on chemicals."
A man grabbed Martha from behind, and a woman pointed a gun at the Doctor. The stalls all closed their hatches.
"I'm sorry, I'm really, really sorry. We just need three, that's all."
"No, let her go! I'm warning you, let her go! Whatever you want, I can help. Both of us, we can help. But first you've got to let her go."
"I'm sorry. I'm really sorry. Sorry."
Milo dragged Martha through a green door, and Cheen locked it behind them. They ran along a passageway while the Doctor tried to get it open.
When they got through to the passageway a car that looked like a truncated tram was parked there.
"The Doctor is so going to kill you, and never mind him, I'm going to kill you myself! Let go of me!"
"Give her some Sleep." The male kidnapper told the female kidnapper
"Don't you dare! Don't put that stuff in me, don't! Get off me!"
"It's just Sleep Fourteen. No, baby, don't fight it." The female kidnapper said,
"I'm telling you, don't!"
Martha fell asleep.
"That's it. Come on. That's it."
"Get on board." In the car he continued talking and said "Engaging anti-gravs. Hold on." He released the handbrake and the car took off.
"She's all right. She's breathing, pulse is fine, and no harm done. She looks rich. She must have got lost." The woman said
"Yeah, well, she's worth her weight in gold to us. This is car four six five diamond six. We have three passengers, repeat three. Request access to the fast lane."
"Access granted." A computerised voice said
"Oh, yes."
Back in Pharmacy Town The Doctor hammered on the closed hatch.
"Thought you'd come back. Do you want some happy Happy?"
"Those people, who were they? Where did they take her?"
"They've taken her to the motorway."
"Looked like carjackers to me."
"I'd give up now, darling. You won't see her again."
"Used to be thriving, this place. You couldn't move. But they all go to the motorway in the end."
"He kept on saying three, we need three. What did he mean, three?" The Doctor enquired,
"It's the car-sharing policy, to save fuel. You get special access if you're carrying three adults."
"This motorway. How do I get there?"
"Straight down the alley, keep going to the end. You canna miss it. Tell you what. How about some happy Happy? Then you'll be smiling, my love."
"Word of advice, all of you. Cash up, close down and pack your bags."
"Why's that, then?"
"Because as soon as I've found her, alive and well. And I will find her alive and well. Then I'm coming back, and this street is closing tonight!"
********************************************
In the kidnappers car the man said "Now you just settle back. It's all going to be worth it."
Martha woke and takes the tab from her neck.
"Yeah. The view from the windows. You can see all the way out to the flatlands. Clear blue sky. They say the air smells like apple grass. Can you imagine?"
"The houses are made of wood. There are jobs going in the foundries. Everyone says so."
Martha pointed the woman's gun at them.
"Take me back. Whoever you are, just take me back to my friend. That's all I want. I won't cause any trouble. Just take me back."
"I'm sorry. That's not a real gun."
"Yeah, well, you would say that."
"Where do you get a gun from, these days? I wouldn't even know how to fire."
"No, nor me. Okay."
Martha put the gun down.
"What's your name?"
"Martha. Martha Jones."
"Well, I'm Cheen, and this is Milo. And I swear we're sorry. We're really, really sorry. We just needed access to the fast line, but I promise, as soon as we arrive, we'll drop you off and you can go back and find your friend." The woman who's name had just been revealed to be called Cheen.
"Seriously?"
"I swear! Look. Honesty patch."
"All the same, it's still kidnapping! Where are we, anyway?"
"We're on the motorway." Milo told her.
"What's that, then? Fog
"That's the exhaust fumes."
"We're going out to Brooklyn. Everyone says the air's so much cleaner, and we couldn't stay in Pharmacy Town, because..."
"Well, because of me. I'm pregnant. We only discovered it last week. Scan says it's going to be a boy."
"Right. What do I do now, congratulate my kidnappers?" (That would be nice)
"Oh, we're not kidnappers. Not really."
"Nope? You're idiots. You're having a baby, and you're wearing that?"
Martha pulled the Honesty patch from Cheen's neck.
"Not anymore."
"This'll be as fast as we can. We'll take the motorway to the Brooklyn flyover, and then after that it's going to take awhile, because then there's no fast lane, just ordinary roads, but at least it's direct."
"It's only ten miles."
"How long is it going to take?"
"About six years." (Just so you know a human can walk at 4 miles an hour so it would only take 2 and a half hours for a normal human to walk that far and it is taking a car 6 years to get there)
"What?"
"Be just in time for him to start school."
"No, sorry, hold on. Six years? Ten miles in six years? How come?"
********************************************
The Doctor unlocked a metal door and stepped out onto a small balcony, coughing in the exhaust fumes. The stationary traffic was stacked in all directions, including up and down. The car nearest the balcony opens its door and a figure in WW2 flying jacket and helmet, goggles and a white scarf across its face looks out. They had an Irish accent.
"Hey! You daft little street strut. What are you doing standing there, with a baby too? Either get out or get in. Come on!"
********************************************
The Doctor got in and gasped for breath.
"Did you ever see the like?"
A dark haired woman gave an oxygen mask to The Doctor who put it on Petra.
"Here you go." She said clearly disapproving of him letting a baby breath in all the exhaust fumes.
"Just standing there, breathing it in." He removed the scarf and goggles, revealing himself to be a cat person just like the sisters of plenitude. "There's this story, says back in the old days, on Junction forty seven, this woman stood in the exhaust fumes for a solid twenty minutes. By the time they found her, her head had swollen to fifty feet."
"Oh, you're making it up."
"A fifty foot head! Just think of it. Imagine picking that nose."
"Oh, stop it. That's disgusting."
"What, did you never pick your nose?"
"Bran, we're moving."
"Right. I'm there. I'm on it."
With a cloud of white smoke from the exhaust pipe, all the cars moved forward a short distance.
"Twenty yards. We're having a good day. And who might you be, sir? Very well-dressed for a hitchhiker."
"Thanks. Sorry, I'm the Doctor, this is Petra my daughter."
"Medical man! My name's Thomas Kincade Brannigan, and this is the bane of my life, the lovely Valerie."
"Nice to meet you."
"And that's the rest of the family behind you."
The Doctor drew back a curtain to reveal a litter of kittens in a basket.
"Ah, that's nice. Hello. How old are they?"
"Just two months."
"Poor little souls. They've never known the ground beneath their paws. Children of the motorway." Brannigan told the Doctor
"What, they were born in here?"
"We couldn't stop. We heard there were jobs going, out in the laundries on Fire Island. Thought we'd take a chance." Said Valery
"What, you've been driving for two months?"
"Do I look like a teenager? We've been driving for twelve years now."
"I'm sorry?"
"Yeah! Started out as newlyweds. Feels like yesterday."
"Feels like twelve years to me."
"Ah, sweetheart, but you're still love me."
"Twelve years? How far did you come? Where did you start,"
"Battery Park. It's five miles back." (That is bad, it should take only an hour and a half to walk that distance)
"You travelled five miles in twelve years?"
"I think he's a bit slow."
"Where are you from?" Valery
"Never mind that. I've got to get out. My friend's in one of these cars. She was taken hostage. I should get back to the Tardis."
"You're too late for that. We've passed the lay-by. You're a passenger now, Sonny Jim."
"When's the next lay-by?"
"Oh, six months?"
********************************************
They are dropped down through the rows of cars.
"How many cars are out there?" Martha asked her kidnappers,
"I don't think anyone knows. Here we go. Hungry?" Cheen said passing Martha a large biscuit,
"Oh, thanks. But how far down is it to this fast lane?"
"Oh, it's right at the bottom, underneath the traffic jam. But not many people can afford three passengers, so it's empty down there. Rumour has it you can reach up to thirty miles per hour." Milo told her,
"Wow. That's, like, crazy. But how are you supposed to live inside this thing? It's tiny."
"Oh, we stocked up. Got self-replicating fuel, muscle stimulants for exercise, and there's a chemical toilet at the back. And all waste products are recycled as food."
"Okay." Martha dumped her large dry biscuit.
"Oh, another gap. This is brilliant."
"Car sign in." Said the sign,
"Car Four Six Five Diamond Six, on descent to fast lane, thank you very much."
"Please drive safely." The sign said,
********************************************
The Doctor hacked into the communications system. "I need to talk to the police." He said,
"Thank you for your call. You have been placed on hold." The computer told him
"But you're the police."
"Thank you for your call. You have been placed on hold."
"Is there anyone else? I once met the Duke of Manhattan. Is there any way of getting through to him?"
"Oh now, ain't you lordly?"
"I've got to find my friend."
"You can't make outside calls. The motorway's completely enclosed."
"What about the other cars?"
"Oh, we've got contact with them, yeah. Well, some of them, anyway. They've got to be on your friends list. Now, let's see. Who's nearby? Ah, the Cassini sisters!"
The screen showed  a picture of two older women and a number, 3-1-7-a-1.
"Still your hearts, my handsome girls. It's Brannigan here."
"Get off the line, Brannigan. You're a pest and a menace."
"Oh, come on, now, sisters. Is that any way to talk to an old friend?"
"You know full well, we're not sisters. We're married.
"Ooo, stop that modern talk. I'm an old-fashioned cat. Now, I've got a hitchhiker here, calls himself the Doctor."
"Hello. Sorry. I'm looking for someone called Martha Jones. She's been carjacked. She's inside one of these vehicles, but I don't know which one."
"Wait a minute. Could I ask, what entrance did they use?" The other Cassini asked.
"Where were we?" The Doctor asked Brannigan
"Pharmacy Town."
"Pharmacy Town," The Doctor told her, "About twenty minutes ago."
"Let's have a look."
"Just my luck to marry a car-spotter. "
"In the last half hour, fifty three new cars joined from the Pharmacy Town junction."
"Anything more specific?" The Doctor asked
"All in good time was she car-jacked by two people?"
"Yes, she was, yeah."
"There we are. Just one of those cars was destined for the fast lane. That means they had three on board. And car number is four six five diamond six."