My diary

dying relationship

lately i've been thinking about you
i read your card
actually read it because i somehow never did before
it sat by my desk but i never read it
when i read it, it was like i somehow finally got why you might have been angry at me

for the most part i feel like your reaction was extreme
your reaction came from a place of hurt
and what you did and said was not right
i would say overreacting even
i told you i didn't want to talk then
because at that time i felt nothing
and you should've known i would still feel nothing no matter what you told me
but you said what you said anyways

and do i feel like i'm at a loss of a friend
to some extent
maybe right now more than ever
as i think about you while laying in bed
perhaps you thought i didn't ever care about you
but that wouldn't be true
i just didn't care for you in that moment

but don't get me wrong it's not like i tried
you just wanted more than what i could give you. i was in a place of drought
but no matter what i say you wouldn't ever hear me out
you always play the victim

how am i supposed to bear fruit from a barrenness tree